w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m

December 30 - January 4
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December
31, 2002
Win a Car For the Kids
The "Maestro Man" of the broadcast booth, Dick
Vitale, has been commentating college basketball for years,
but his charity work is almost as big as his love of hoops.
Dickie V is a big supporter of the Boys
and Girls Club of Sarasota, and in his hometown of
Sarasota, he's hosting another edition of the annual Dick Vitale
Sports Night. Even those of you not fortunate enough to live
in Florida can still put in a bid for Sports Night charity auction.
For $1000, you can enter your name to win a 2003 Mercedes-Benz.
Entries are limited, so get your name in the drawing today,
and help a good cause at the same time. To
enter, call 941-928-1766
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December
31, 2002
Zany Report: Year End Edition
The lovable Bob
Zany is set to close out the year with his final Zany
Report of 2002. This
legendary comic and all around great guy, will be sure to bring
his A-material for what is going to be the biggest, funniest,
most spectacular report of year (no pressure, Bob). If you arent
laughing when its all said and done, you can always go
to BobZany.com and test
your hand at punch line writing by playing Fix
The Joke Baby. Pick up one of those "Papa Eat Now"
T-shirts while you're at it.
Side Note
Bob was just informed about our expectations for this
week's report. He quickly scrapped what he had already written,
and began writing new material.
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December
31, 2002
The Ringer Returns
Bill Scheft has
spent the last 10 years writing monologues for David Letterman,
and earning multiple Emmy nominations while doing so. He's been
a big part of both Late Night,
and
The
Late Show with David Letterman,
but Scheft has recently enjoyed success writing comedy in a
whole new way, this time as a novelist. His book, The
Ringer, has been praised by many, including Letterman himself,
and has been flying off of bookshelves. Since filling in for
Bob as a guest host a few months back, we haven't seen much
of Bill, but we hear he's got his version of the worlds funniest
joke lined up, along with news concerning the return of his
brother's obscure rock band.
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December 30, 2002
Every
Show is a Double Feature
Covering titillating topics like Barn Yard Bondage and Swingstock
for Playboy TVs Sexcetera,
Scott Potasnik is no stranger
to provocative programming. His most recent small-screen work
includes stints on two of MTV's highest profile series: Jackass
and Blame Game. Scott got
his start on Real TV, where he
honed his reporting skills on in-depth stories but is now enjoying
the benefits of working for Playboy, including movie night at
the Mansion.
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December
30, 2002
A Surprise Visit From
Tim Wilson
So what if he shows up a day early? Few comedians cause more
controversy when they enter the studio than the southern singer/songwriter,
Tim
Wilson. His brash outlook on everyday aspects of life, and
the fact he has no problem speaking his mind, no matter how
politically incorrect his views may be, have led to Bob &
Tom to air a disclaimer almost every time Little Timmy Wilson
opens his mouth. Not to say we dont find him hysterically
funny; we just do everything in our power to disassociated with
him.
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"If your ass can dial the phone,
I want to take a look at you."
- Chick McGee
"I used to drive to all my gigs because when you are the
worlds greatest juggler, that's what happens."
- Chris Bliss
"I have enough deception in my personal life, I don't need
someone adding to it on stage."
- Chris Bliss on Magicians
"I have played a clarinet with my penis, but never a piano
with balls."
- Chick McGee on the Juggling piano player.
"I saw that there was a GMAC Bowl this year which is aptly
named because there is absolutely no interest."
- Bill Scheft
"That is going to be a turd on wheels."
- Tom Griswold on Lisa Marie Presley's debut album.
"You rarely find silicone and good food in the same building."
- Tim Wilson on Hooters restaurants
"If you can see me, you're in my way."
- Tom Griswold's new
T-shirt
"Churchill, MacArthur, and Roosevelt all smoked. Cigarettes
won World War II."
- Tim Wilson
"You're surprised I know my porn? Come on, you are talking
to daddy here."
- Bob Kevoian talking to Scott Potasnik from Playboy TV
"I am not a prude just because I don't like to flaunt my
johnson around."
- Tom Griswold
"I've been listening to you guys since I was a kid, and you
guys are pervs."
- Scott Potasnik from Playboy TV
"You don't finish a movie like 'Hot to Trot' and think, man,
we're never going to get one better than that. "
- Bobcat Goldthwait
"Well there ya go."
- Bob Kevoian to a man who removed a tattoo after drinking a pint
of Jim Beam
"I'm like Dennis Miller for dummies."
- Charlie Viricola
"You can't be a racist in LA. You'd be exhausted."
- Charlie woo
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