THE BOB & TOM SHOW - Program Notes

w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m

January 28 - February 1, 2007

A Nice Young Man
Growing up in Elizabeth, New Jersey, Kyle Grooms’ mother did everything she could to raise him as a nice young boy. Little did she know that when she was taking him to Cub Scoot meetings, he spent more of his time reciting Richard Pryor albums than he did leaning to tie knots. He quickly discovered that making people laugh was his true passion, and after a brief affair with vandalism and graffiti art, Kyle decided that comedy was the profession for him. In 1995 he made the leap into standup and has been performing all over the country ever since. He’s been seen on Tough Crowd, Chappelle’s Show and Def Comedy Jam, and was also the star of his own Comedy Central special.

Super Frank
Master impressionist and comedian Frank Caliendo is no stranger to TV. He was a fixture on the sketch comedy show Mad TV, has his own show on TBS called Frank TV, and is a regular guest on Late Night with David Letterman, but this weekend Frank will be featured on the grandest stage of them all, the Super Bowl. This year's NFL championship game will be broadcast on the FOX network, and will be covered by the FOX Sports team, which just so happens to be the pre-game show that Frank Caliendo works for. Can this year's sketch live up to the hilarity of his previous installments? Be one of the 90 million plus viewers who tune in to find out.

Henry Phillips and Greg Warren discuss Greg's cauliflower ear.

The Flute-Man Cometh
Better known to our audience as "Flute-Man Greg," Greg Warren first charmed us with stories about children who have bigfoot hunting fathers and the odd behaviors of his forty or so uncles. But it was his bit on playing the clarinet in high school that really cemented his place in BOB&TOM Show history, especially when he introduced us to the phrase "hit 'em with your flute, Greg." Among his other accomplishments, Warren is also a former state champion in wrestling, has a cauliflower ear, and is a regular on the BOB&TOM All-Stars Comedy Tour.

Here He Is...
It's been a long seven days since we last visited with comedian Tim Bedore, which is why we're so eager to have him back on his special line ready to deliver another exciting edition of Vague But True. Live from his home in Minnesota where he's seated comfortably at mission control, Tim shares his thoughts on life, society, politics and his day to day activities, presented in the form of in-depth, entertaining editorials. Over the past few years, these musings have helped us learn a lot about Bedore, including his thoughts on downloading movies, the joy one can find in a SkyMall magazine, his time spent at summer camp and his theory on how animals are trying to wipe out our species.

We'd Like to Buy a Vowel
If the name didn't tip you off, comedian Costaki Economopoulos comes from a Greek background, which is why it's not surprising he's been described as a “joke philosopher.” And we're positive he's not the only one saying that. Known for his clever writing, Costaki's punch lines have been heard on The Tonight Show, BET, and MTV. In other news, Costaki is featured twice on the new BOB&TOM album We Just Landed with his Economonologue and is dating the beautiful and funny comedienne, Caroline Rhea.

Joe's Side of the Story
Nothing in life makes the Chickster happier than his beloved Washington Redskins, which is why we've not been able to get him out of the studio since he found out his hero, former 'Skins QB Joe Theismann, would be calling us. It comes as no surprise that Chick has a huge man-crush on Theismann, he's only one of the all time greats in franchise history. He lead the team to two Super Bowls, winning one, was named to the Pro-Bowl twice, NFL MVP once and owns most of the Redskins passing records. Late last year, Joe invited Chick to spend a few days with him out in Washington D.C. and even took him to a Redskins game for his birthday. Though Chick has gone on and on about his adventures ever since he's been back, we're anxious to hear Joe's side of the story. We may even try to get a Super Bowl XLII prediction out of him.

www.prostatecare.com

JORDAN WARD illustration

A Big Starr
While it’s true that comedy is always evolving, it’s nice to know that there are a few guys out there who still do things old-fashioned way. Joe Starr is one of those guys. Described as a throwback to classic comedy, Starr says his influences began with Charlie Chaplin and ended when television went to color. With the style of the “Rat-Pack” and the charm of an everyman, Starr has found a way to be uncommon, unique and familiar all at the same time. Joe is a favorite at the Montreal “Just For Laughs” Comedy Festival, having played there five times, and is a regular on Comedy Central’s Premium Blend. He’s also made the move over to acting by appearing in World Trade Center and The Bronx is Burning.

Your Weekly Report Card
If you're wondering why there is a feeling of emptiness deep inside your soul, it's because you've been without The Zany Report for an entire week. For those new to the show, The Zany Report, as brought to you each week by Bob Zany, is the only segment we have that comes equipped with its own built-in comedy safety net. Even if the Report fails to make the trip all the way to Funny-ville, America's Favorite game show "Fix the Joke Baby" will be able to turn that frown upside down. And once again some lucky fan will win a few cool T-shirts, Zany's chart topping CD, I Just Can't Win Baby, and a very valuable one year subscription to the BOB&TOM VIP site.

JORDAN WARD illustration

Kid Rock
Live in the Studio
Kid Rock is a man you can't easily put a label on and that's because he doesn't fit nicely into any specific music genre. Since his debut album in 1998, Rock has kept us all guessing by writing and performing music that encompasses hard rock, hip-hop, pop and even country. This fall Kid Rock , "The American Badass," released his most soulful album to date, Rock & Roll Jesus. We're hoping we might hear a few tunes from this collection and maybe some of his other classics . He'll be playing live playing live this morning when he stops by the BOB&TOM studio.

JORDAN WARD illustration

Roasting History
If an event of any importance has happened in the past, chances are comedian Scott Dunn can write a joke about it. Well, not just a joke, an entire routine to be exact. How can we make such a bold statement? We have the proof. Scott has spent the past year calling in to the show every Monday to give us a little history lesson, with a twist. These lessons aren’t boring and stuffy like when your grandpa rambles on about his youth. No, these tales from times past are chock-full of jokes, laughs and even a few actual historical tidbits you might be able to use in a trivia game down the road.

January 21 - 25
Program Notes

"Everything I touch turns to sold."
- Kenny Tarmac

"You can talk about me in the tabloids all you want, but those come out every week and are forgotten. Songs like this, they stick around a lot longer."
- Kid Rock on his new song "So Hott" and how song writers get revenge

"The only professions where people prefer someone with little experience are politics and prostitution."
- Scott Dunn

"As a liberal, it pains me to say this, but when is America finally going to wake up and realize that tigers hate gay people."
- Auggie Smith on the recent tiger attacks and Siegfried and Roy.

"In Asia, the name Ty(rone) means 'creativity.' In America it means 'not hiring.'"
- Ty Barnett

"Why would I lie to you, we're not married?"
- Ross Bennett to Bob Kevoian

"My biggest fear about voting is getting trapped in the booth."
- Jamie Lissow

"This is like a think-tank of nothing."
- Tammy Pescatelli on The BOB&TOM Show

"Are we on the air or are these practice shows we're doing?"
- Chick McGee

"I've come across a fecal monument or two."
- Tom Griswold on the stains on shopping carts

"Kristi Lee Love You Long Time."
- Possible slogan for Kristi Lee in 2008

"Never play flag football in the nude."
- Bob Kevoian

"Whore's gotta eat too."
- Kristi Lee after hearing the story of the prostitute at Thanksgiving dinner

"I'm the boy in the bubble without the bubble."
- Jimmy Pardo on his multiple allergies

"Instruction manuals are nothing more than another man's opinion."
- Chick McGee

"Kids to me are like ghosts. I'm not afraid of them, but I don't want to move into a building that has them."
- Auggie Smith

"My ex-wife told me she wanted a divorce because she'd lost the tingle. I don't know what a tingle is, but it's equivalent to one house."
- Emo Philips

"If you start with it in there, it's okay."
- Bob Kevoian explaining how a thong is different than a wedgies

"I have a gorgeous taint."
- Chick McGee

"Her favorite recording artist is Tomas Edison."
- Bob Kevoian to Granny during the Shoe-In of the Week.

"I'm not going to get an operation on my johnson just because some e-mail keeps suggesting it. But my wife just keeps sending it."
- Nathan Trenholm

"Every project my dad worked on started with 'I can do it' and ended with 'nobody's gonna see that'."
- Andres Fernandez

"How low have you sank when you are going to Greg Hahn for relationship advice."
- Orny Adams to Kristi Lee

"Didn't we leave Tuna Town and move to cookoo-ville?"
- Tom Griswold on Anne Heche

"Now on sale we've got the OJ Simpson 'Find the Real Killer' Mirror. Is it magic or just common sense."
- Billy Mayzing with a new crop of amazing products

"When I'm 80 years old, just sign me up for a nice bowl movement."
-Tom Griswold on Hef and getting older

"My dog will talk your ear off if you let him."
- Dan Grueter on giving his dog a redneck voice

"They show too many commercials at the movies. That's the biggest crime in the world."
- Bob Kevoian

"The only difference between southern sodomy and prison rape is their taste in music."
- Tom Griswold

"I bet gay guys have sex all the time because there aren't any women to tell them no."
- Larry Reeb

"My to-do list consists of women's names and drugs."
- Shane Mauss

"Joe Theismann won't be here for another four hours so you may want to hold off on taking that Viagra."
- Tom Griswold to Chick McGee

"Ladies, if you don't want to date a drunk, don't go shopping at the drunk store."
- Shane Mauss on women picking up men in bars

"If I stopped drinking scotch, Johnny Walker would have to get rid of one of their trucks."
- Ron White

"Are you at all self sufficient?"
- Tom Griswold to Ron White

"I played basketball in highschool and they used to call me the mailman. Not because I was good, but because I used to shoot up the locker room after a bad loss."
- Rob Haney

"I like the WNBA. There is nothing like a two-hour layup drill."
- John Evans