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w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m           

February 18 - 22, 2008

Larry The Movie Star
He became popular with the hapless cable installer character but Larry The Cable Guy is quickly becoming the reason why cable installer jobs exist in the first place. With a three films under his substantial belt, he's already working on another. Larry the Cable Guy made his feature film debut in the movie, Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector, which is now available on DVD. Soon after, he was the main draw in the Disney/Pixar animated film Cars where he provided the voice of a pickup truck. He's currently starring in Witless Protection, where he portrays a small town sherriff who gets involved with a high profile FBI Case and all hell breaks loose. Larry also keeps a busy schedule on the road, performing his stand up all over the country. Like many of today's best comics, you probably heard him here first!

 
Sorry Kids, Mom's
Busy This Weekend

Christine Steadman began performing standup comedy as a way to get out of babysitting grandchildren, however she's turned this lame "excuse" into a succcessful career. Every night Christine hits the stage, she shares her unique perspectives on life and it's tribulatons with the audience. She's a Las Vegas and Atlantic City favorite and has been featured on The View and Bud Light Ladies of Laughter. For about a year and a half, she toured with soap opera actor Walt Willey from ABC's All My Children. Not too bad for a woman who simply wanted to avoid changing diapers.
 

Hickey Head
One thing you can count on whenever Ralph Harris stops by the studio is that it's going to be a good time. Whether he's performing as his glazed donut loving Uncle Mosley or being offered a career opportunity as Tom's personal assistant, Harris never fails to make the most out of each visit. A Tonight Show veteran, Harris does much more than just tell jokes on stage, he acts them out. During a performance he's constantly developing and transforming himself into new and interesting characters which means when he starts reliving his childhood memories he doesn't just talk about his relatives, he becomes them. Ralph's natural chameleon-like ability has helped him land a few high profile appearances on television including specials on HBO and Comedy Central and a role on the legendary sitcom, Seinfeld.

Side Note - Ralph's new CD, "Hickey Head," is available at the BOB&TOM Store!

 

Keep Your Chen Up
Every artist at some point in their life finds the inspiration needed to get themselves going. For comedian Stan Chen, it was witnessing an absolutely abysmal standup comedy performance during a New Years Eve party. That fateful evening, one comics bombing turned into another comedian’s success as Chen decided right then to dedicate his life to making people laugh. He has since gone on to compete in world class comedy competitions and work clubs throughout the Midwest. Chen has appeared on the show before, but it was only as the friend of another guest. During his brief time on the air, Stan was very impressive, and BOB&TOM have been eagerly anticipating his return, when we can all learn a little bit more about this up and coming comedic talent.

 
 

Trancendental Comedy
Paul Mecurio has become a regular feature on the BOB&TOM show and we're fortunate to be regular stop on his "mercurial" (sorry) journey. After walking away from a cush Wall Street job he started as a staff writer for Jay Leno and soon found himself collecting awards for his work with the "Daily Show with Jon Stewart" where his duties currently include the pre-show warm up. He frequently performs this duty in a very personal way by doing his act while hanging out with the audience. Paul is currently featured on the Canadian Mist BOB&TOM All Stars Comedy Tour.

 

He's a Geek and
He's Proud if it!

Leo Laporte seems to be everywhere – he has worked as an author, speaker, and broadcaster in New Haven, Monterey, San Jose, San Francisco, and Los Angeles, most recently focusing on technology coverage for radio, television, and the Internet. He's written software, he was the co-author, with former ABC Technology Correspondent Gina Smith, of ”101 Computer Answers You Need to Know,” and was a Managing Editor at Ziff-Davis Television, where he wrote and co-hosted ”The Personal Computing Show,” a half-hour weekly television show for beginning computer users that aired on CNBC. Currently Leo hosts a national radio technology talk show called "The Tech Guy" every Saturday and Sunday from 2-5p Eastern on the Premiere Radio Networks including XM Channel 158, and The Lab With Leo, a daily hour-long television show produced in Vancouver, BC and aired in Canada on G4TechTV, and Australia on the HOW-TO Channel.

 
John Foster from Lafayette, Indiana sent these marble sculptures to Kristi and Bob - the marble was re-claimed from Larh House Motel in Lafayette, IN. Train tracks ran in front of the hotel and the trains would stop between Indy and Chicago - it is believed that famous people such as Al Capone have walked on this marble. We're guessing the marble ass sculpture for Tom is under construction.
 
 
Paul Thorn poses with the B&T gang.
 

Uptown with
Brad Upton

In 1984, Brad Upton was a fourth-grade teacher and part-time stand-up comedian.  By 1986, he’d decided to kick the kids to the curb and take up comedy full-time.  Over the past 20 plus years, Upton has headlined just about every major club from Alaska to Florida and has developed a style that people of any age can enjoy.  He’s been seen on A&E, MTV and Showtime, and is a former winner of the Las Vegas Comedy Festival.  Along with comedy clubs, Upton is also a favorite on cruise ships and corporate clients.  So if you’re looking for entertainment in any of those venues, Brad Upton’s your man.

 

Animal Lover
Since Tim Bedore's popular segment, Vague But True, has become a regular feature on the BOB&TOM show, certain topics seem to pop up on a regular basis. One of the most popular subject matters has been the secret war raging between man and beast which Tim has dubbed the "Animal Conspiracy." The first installment of this larger work appeared on the album B&T Camel Toe almost four years ago, but as the news stories keep adding up and listener e-mails keep rolling in, Tim has had no choice but to continue informing the masses about this ongoing battle. Will the battle continue in this week's report? You'll just have to tune in to find out.

 

Chick McGee,
Media Darling

Hey Bob, Tom, Kristi & Chick,
I wanted to drop you a line with a link to the news video of Chick stuck at the airport that appeared on the local news. The video is on their website and is called "Snow Wearing Thin On Peoples' Patience." You can see Chick at the 1:09 mark, but don't blink or you may miss him. I also wanted to let you know the show Saturday night in Des Moines was one of the best comedy shows I've been to in a very long time. Everyone was great, but between Chick being a nicer drunk than I would have thought and Dwight Slade being 10x as funny in person made the night a truly unforgettable event.
-David Williams III

 

It's a Great Day!
You know it is going to be a great day when Paul Thorn is scheduled to be on the BOB&TOM show. Thorn's an accomplished painter and singer/songwriter who also happens to be an ex-boxer, which means when he sings about whooping somebody's ass, he knows exactly what he's talking about. Though It's a Great Day has become a classic and is the "Stairway to Heaven" of Thorn's musical library, most of his tunes are much softer and soulful. Listen to Paul Thorn’s gospel inspired music and you'll end up either laughing or crying by the end of the song, maybe even a little of both. Paul Thorn fought middleweight Champ Roberto Duran on national television, has written songs with John Bon Jovi and Timothy B. Schmidt of the Eagles and lists skydiving as one of his favorite hobbies.

 

If Only Every Day Could Be Tuesday
Though he's never won an Emmy and has yet to star in a hit sitcom, Bob Zany is still number one in our hearts, or at least a close second. Everybody knows that Zany is a legendary comedian and an all around great guy, but what people truly love about Bob is that each and every week he delivers an all new exciting edition of The Zany Report (whether they want him to or not.) As if that wasn't enough, Zany also hosts *America's favorite game show "Fix-the-Joke Baby," where one lucky player will win a fabulous Eat Salmon the Other Pink Meat T-shirt, a handful of great CDs, and best of all, a one-year BOB&TOM VIP membership.

*Highest rated game show statistics have not yet been verified, but Zany assures us that these numbers are completely accurate.

JORDAN WARD illustration

 

C'mon, It's Jokes
The only thing harder to spell than Costaki Economopoulos' name, is the weekly feature he hosts, The Economonologue. However, we figure that sense it's a made up word, we've got a little wiggle room if we happen to misplace an 'o' or a 'u.' And though his is not a name you'd want to get as a puzzle on Wheel of Fortune, it is one you don't seeing on our guest board because he's one of the most clever comedians working today. He also happens to be dating the very lovely and very funny Caroline Rhea.

 

The Lighter Side of History
If an event of any importance has happened in the past, chances are comedian Scott Dunn can write a joke about it.  Well, not just a joke, an entire routine to be exact.  How can we make such a bold statement?  We have the proof.  Scott has spent the past year calling in to the show every Monday to give us a little history lesson, with a twist. These lessons aren’t boring and stuffy like when your grandpa rambles on about his youth.  No, these tales from times past are chock-full of jokes, laughs and even a few actual historical tidbits you might be able to use in a trivia game down the road.

 


 


"Get off the treadmill and go to the bar."
- Kristi Lee on how she doesn't like that her gym is becoming a pick-up joint

"Those strip mall karate places only teach you enough to get your ass whupped"
- Paul Thorn

"I scissor-kicked a circus bear to help raise over $200 to raise awareness for animal cruelty."
- Donnie Baker on bear wrestling

"I'm not available... when is it?
- Tom Griswold when asked to attend the Ferret Festival with Chick

"Everything I touch turns to sold."
- Kenny Tarmac

"You can talk about me in the tabloids all you want, but those come out every week and are forgotten. Songs like this, they stick around a lot longer."
- Kid Rock on his new song "So Hott" and how song writers get revenge

"The only professions where people prefer someone with little experience are politics and prostitution."
- Scott Dunn

"As a liberal, it pains me to say this, but when is America finally going to wake up and realize that tigers hate gay people."
- Auggie Smith on the recent tiger attacks and Siegfried and Roy.

"In Asia, the name Ty(rone) means 'creativity.' In America it means 'not hiring.'"
- Ty Barnett

"Why would I lie to you, we're not married?"
- Ross Bennett to Bob Kevoian

"My biggest fear about voting is getting trapped in the booth."
- Jamie Lissow

"This is like a think-tank of nothing."
- Tammy Pescatelli on The BOB&TOM Show

"Are we on the air or are these practice shows we're doing?"
- Chick McGee

"I've come across a fecal monument or two."
- Tom Griswold on the stains on shopping carts

"Kristi Lee Love You Long Time."
- Possible slogan for Kristi Lee in 2008

"Never play flag football in the nude."
- Bob Kevoian

"Whore's gotta eat too."
- Kristi Lee after hearing the story of the prostitute at Thanksgiving dinner

"I'm the boy in the bubble without the bubble."
- Jimmy Pardo on his multiple allergies

"Instruction manuals are nothing more than another man's opinion."
- Chick McGee

"Kids to me are like ghosts. I'm not afraid of them, but I don't want to move into a building that has them."
- Auggie Smith

"My ex-wife told me she wanted a divorce because she'd lost the tingle. I don't know what a tingle is, but it's equivalent to one house."
- Emo Philips

"If you start with it in there, it's okay."
- Bob Kevoian explaining how a thong is different than a wedgies

"I have a gorgeous taint."
- Chick McGee

"Her favorite recording artist is Tomas Edison."
- Bob Kevoian to Granny during the Shoe-In of the Week.

"I'm not going to get an operation on my johnson just because some e-mail keeps suggesting it. But my wife just keeps sending it."
- Nathan Trenholm

"Every project my dad worked on started with 'I can do it' and ended with 'nobody's gonna see that'."
- Andres Fernandez

"How low have you sank when you are going to Greg Hahn for relationship advice."
- Orny Adams to Kristi Lee

"Didn't we leave Tuna Town and move to cookoo-ville?"
- Tom Griswold on Anne Heche

"Now on sale we've got the OJ Simpson 'Find the Real Killer' Mirror. Is it magic or just common sense."
- Billy Mayzing with a new crop of amazing products

"When I'm 80 years old, just sign me up for a nice bowl movement."
-Tom Griswold on Hef and getting older

"My dog will talk your ear off if you let him."
- Dan Grueter on giving his dog a redneck voice

"They show too many commercials at the movies. That's the biggest crime in the world."
- Bob Kevoian

"The only difference between southern sodomy and prison rape is their taste in music."
- Tom Griswold

"I bet gay guys have sex all the time because there aren't any women to tell them no."
- Larry Reeb

"My to-do list consists of women's names and drugs."
- Shane Mauss

"Joe Theismann won't be here for another four hours so you may want to hold off on taking that Viagra."
- Tom Griswold to Chick McGee

"Ladies, if you don't want to date a drunk, don't go shopping at the drunk store."
- Shane Mauss on women picking up men in bars

"If I stopped drinking scotch, Johnny Walker would have to get rid of one of their trucks."
- Ron White

"Are you at all self sufficient?"
- Tom Griswold to Ron White

"I played basketball in highschool and they used to call me the mailman. Not because I was good, but because I used to shoot up the locker room after a bad loss."
- Rob Haney

"I like the WNBA. There is nothing like a two-hour layup drill."
- John Evans