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March 15 - 19 2004

March 19, 2004
“That Guy's No George Carlin...”
A lawyer walks into a bar, and after pounding a few beers decides to become a standup comedian. This may sounds like the opening to a bad joke, but it's actually the story of comedian Dan Kaufman… give or take a few important facts. Once upon a time Kaufman was a successful attorney, but that all changed once he decided he no longer wanted to do any kind of actual work to make a living. Soon after, Kaufman left the courtroom and followed his dream of performing in front of a crowd that didn't have to deliberate after each show. Now, dressed a bit more casually than in his former profession, Dan delivers his thought-provoking, smart and edgy comedy act in clubs and colleges across the country. Kaufman convinced us it would be wise to include all those adjectives in this paragraph, otherwise legal action could be taken.

FACTOID - Dan Kaufman is also an extremely talented artist and portrait painter.

 

March 19, 2004
Coming Soon to HBO
Latino comedian Rick Gutierrez has been cracking up audiences across the country with his throwback takes on traditional family values and outlooks on marriage for years, but it’s about time some higher ups in Hollywood finally got wind of his comedic talents. Gutierrez is slated to star in an HBO comedy series based on his life and the experiences he talks about in his standup act (so make sure to catch him live if you want a head start on the series). Rick’s other television credits include NBC's Friday Night Videos, BET Comic View and Showtime's Latino Laugh Festival.

 

March 18, 2004
He's Singin' Again
Singer/songwriter/loveable loser Henry Phillips is one of the most clever comedians on the planet. Though his songs are often a tad out of the ordinary, and focus on the darker twisted side of life, we find his soft spoken self-depreciating personality quite adorable, which makes him a lot of fun to be around... especially if you've got a poker game going. Henry got his start in comedy as a folk singer, turning the depressing headlines from the newspaper into a tune called “What Do You Want Me to Do About It.” From those humble beginnings, Henry is now a top draw in clubs across the country and he's put out two stellar comedy albums containing such classics as "On the Shoulders of Freaks," "She’s Talkin' Again," and "When We Were Young."

 

March 18, 2004
The Business
of Comedy

While trying to put himself through Colgate University, a young Mark Klein decided the best way to earn a supplemental income was to perform a little standup comedy in his spare time. How was he to know it would blossom into a full-fledged career… putting that English major to good use. To earn a living, Mark knew he was going to have to use his business sense and work ethic if he was going to turn comedy into a career. In doing so, he felt his fast speaking, easy to follow, pro business comedy would be best suited to those folks who could most appreciate it, business people. Though Klein now spends the majority of his time working large company functions and performing for CEO's he still finds time in his busy schedule to hit up the occasional comedy club or nationally syndicated morning show.

 

March 18, 2004
Damn, Shaniqua!
What do you get when you mix the daughter of a Pentecostal preacher with a CPA? According to our research, you'll end up with comedienne René Hicks. René has the unique privilege of being the only African-American woman ever nominated for an "American Comedy Award," something she credits to her intelligent and universal humor. Aside from making her comedy accessible to everyone, she's also known for individualizing her material for every city, campus or corporation she performs for. Hicks is no stranger to television and has been seen on Hangin’ with Mr. Cooper, Politically Incorrect and CNN's Showbiz Today. She’s also famous for her "Douche Commercial" comedy piece from BOB&TOM’s album Funhouse.

March 17, 2004
Luck o' the Irish

What would St. Patrick's day be without a little Irish comedy? That's why we've brought back our favorite Irish singer/songwriter Pat Godwin to entertain us with a handful of new tunes, as well as a few of the old classics. You may be asking yourself "he was just in a week ago, how does he already have new material ?" That's just how talented Mr. Godwin is. Not only is Pat a fantastic songwriter and excellent guitarist, he's got the uncanny ability to mimic the voice and style of almost any other artist you can name. Even if you've heard him perform his classic tunes like "Nobody Speaks English Anymore," "Switch to Beer" or "C'est La Vie," it's always a new experience because Pat rarely sings a song the same way twice. So throw on a green shirt, pour a bowl of Lucky Charms and chug a pint of Guinness as Pat Godwin helps us kick off St. Patty's right.

 

March 17, 2004
Throw It Down,
Big Man

Love him or hate him, Bill Walton has become one of the most recognized voices in NBA broadcasting. Not only is he among the more opinionated commentators, his “throw it down” catchphrase has become a staple of the sport. Before becoming a legend in the broadcast booth, Walton made a name for himself on the court as one of the greatest centers in basketball history, both in college and professional play. During his three years in college, Walton won a number of NCAA awards and individual records and was also a part of the UCLA team that won 88 straight games along with a couple of National Championships. In the pros, he was a number one overall pick in the draft, won two NBA titles (with Portland and Boston), was the league MVP in 1978, and is a member of the NBA Hall-of-Fame. With all these accomplishments under his belt, it’s no wonder Bill is being considered for the NCAA All-Time Tournament Team. He’s up against some lofty competition for the center position on the squad, but you can help him earn a spot on the roster by voting for your favorite players at www.ncaasports.com/pontiac.

FACTOID - Bill Walton scored 44 points on 21-of-22 shooting in 1973 NCAA tournament win over Memphis State.

 

March 17, 2004
It's NCAA Tournament Time and Dickie V is in Hoops Heaven Baby!
Selection Sunday has come and gone and the field of 65 is set for the most exciting event of the basketball season. Though NCAA rules forbid us from calling the tournament by it's more popular name, we can say that the FINALs will come down to FOUR schools facing off in San Antonio. The tourney will last most of the month of MARCH and will be utter MADNESS, beginning this Thursday (or Tuesday, if you count the "play-in" game). To help get your brackets filled in correctly before your office pool starts, we've got Dick Vitale, the most recognized voice in college basketball, returning to the BOB&TOM Show for the first time this season. Though the "Maestro Man" of the broadcast booth is kept busy calling games for ESPN, he did find time to write a brand new book Living a Dream, which takes a look at what it was like spending the past 25 years working in the best seat in the house.

Dickie V is a big supporter of the Boys and Girls Club of Sarasota where he hosts a Sports Night every year to raise money. Even those of you not fortunate enough to live in Florida can still put in a bid to win the Sports Night charity raffle. For only $1000, you could win a new silver 2004 Mercedes CLK 320 Cabriolet Convertible. Entries are limited, so get your name in the drawing today, and help a good cause at the same time. To enter, click here and download an application.

 

March 17, 2004
The Best Reason to Go With Satellite TV
How do you end up with a name like “Larry the Cable Guy?” It helps if your first name is Larry, and having a job like installing cable doesn’t hurt either. Fortunately for comedian Larry the Cable Guy, he meets both requirements. Larry’s just your average everyday American standup comic who loves freedom, Miss January, making boobs out of play dough, chicken fried steak, and the Dukes of Hazard. But most of all, Larry enjoys speaking his mind. He’s known for his “redneck” way of spouting opinionated commentaries anywhere he can, including on stage, online, and now once again on The BOB&TOM Show.

FACTOID - Larry The Cable Guy is featured in a team up effort movie with good friends Jeff Foxworthy, Bill Engvall, and Ron White called The Blue Collar Comedy Tour: The Movie.

 

March 16, 2004
Robert Klein Returns!
Though comedian Robert Klein entered Alfred University as a pre-med student, he knew from the very beginning it was a job in the entertainment industry that he really wanted. He first got the acting bug in college after joining the acting company on campus, though it wasn’t until he joined the famous Second City comedy troupe in 1965 that his comedic abilities came to the forefront. After a year with Second City, Klein moved back to New York where he began working as an actor on Broadway while at the same time honing his standup comedy material. In 1973, Klein released his first of many comedy albums, Child of the Fifties, for which he earned a Grammy Award nomination and introduced his work to a larger audience. His following albums also earned Grammy nominations and have all been re-released due to popular demand. Though he’s become known for his standup, Klein returns to Broadway on occasion and pops up in movies and on Television every so often. Most recently, Klein can be seen playing Stan Stone on the new sitcom, The Stones. The show is about the crazy reality of two adult children living in their childhood home with their divorcing but still friendly parents. It airs every Wednesday on CBS.

 

March 16, 2004
Dr. Will
Raids Our Fridge

Bob & Tom PSYCHOtherapist, and long time friend of the show, Dr. Will Miller's book Refrigerator Rights took an in depth look at what friendship in America is all about by examining how individuals give out Refrigerator Rights. In other words, how many friends do you have that are allowed to just walk right in your home and start rummaging through you're ice box? If you can't think of many, than perhaps this book is right for you. And don't give us that old "hardcover books are too expensive for me to buy," argument because Dr. Will's book is now available in paperback. What's the use of having a full fridge if you've got nobody to share it with?

 

March 16, 2004
The Joy of Zany
Comedian Bob Zany may not realize it by the way we treat him when he calls in, but he's our most eagerly anticipated guest each week. There are few comedians working today that have the guts it takes to come on a nationally syndicated radio show every week and perform all new material. Then to top it all off, he invites listeners to call in and fix his jokes that some have deemed 'virtually laugh free.' Sounds fun doesn't it? Catch The Zany Report so you too can play "Fix the Joke Baby" where the prize package includes CDs, t-shirts, and a BOB&TOM VIP membership.

 

March 15, 2004
Kiss Cavanagh - He's Irish!
Tim Cavanagh has always believed in giving each and every holiday its due. He's put a lot of work into making sure his extensive catalogue of songs includes some sort of dedication to almost every event. Tim has tributes to frantic Flag Day, Groundhog Day, and the both Equinoxes, but don't think it's just the so called "lesser" holidays that get his attention. Every so often he'll put together a dedication to one of the big days... the heavy hitters of the holiday crowd. Say for instance, everyone's favorite reason to drink, St. Patrick's Day.

 
March 15, 2004
Colby Ousted In a Survivor Sneak Attack
In a stunning Tribal Council, Colby Donaldson, the 29-year-old All-Star of SURVIVOR: THE AUSTRALIAN OUTBACK from Christoval, Texas, was shocked to hear his name read as the tribe he thought he controlled stabbed him in the back and sent him packing. Viewed as the strongest member of his tribe, Colby proved too great a threat as Mogo Mogo eliminated him in a three to two decision.
Shortly after leaving Tribal Council, Colby concluded, "Ultimately, when your day's up, you've got to be okay with that. You've got to feel good about what you've done."
Survivor - Allstars website
 
 


"Are you guys laughing with me, or at me?"
- Dan Kaufman after the debut of his song 'Fish & Paint'

"If I don't get my 16 hours of sleep, I'm just not my self."
- Chick McGee

"To make sure my daughter's book is a success, I have decided not to endorse it."
- "Al Gore," on his daughter's first novel

"My aunt was so kosher that she wouldn't eat at God's restaurant."
- Mark Klein

"My life is like Henry's only with more money."
- Tom Griswold on Herny's lifestyle & living space

"I like to give back through my art what I've taken from life. So far, all I've gotten is crap so that's all I've got to give."
- Henry Phillips

"It's not how big you are, it's how big you play."
- Bill Walton

"I come from the most unathletic family ever."
- Bill Walton

"Jesus isn't really 'the big guy.' He's more like the vice president."
- Tom Griswold on Heaven's hierarchy

"Would the Cocker Spaniel's pet rabbit be known as the Hare of the Dog?"
- Bob Kevoian

"I've gone from being a guest to 'someone we have to deal with'."
- Tim Cavanagh

"Is the Microsoft church known as Geek Orthodox."
- Bob Kevoian on the new virtual church

"My wife and I have a great sex life because we love each other for who we are. Tonight, I am a Swedish ski instructor."
- Dan St. Paul

"In San Francisco everybody is getting married. You can't find casual sex anywhere."
- Dan St. Paul

"I use Lava Soap, the soap with the built in loofah."
- Bob Kevoian

"If you would go home right now, we could be having a good time."
- Tom Griswold to Chick

"I don't know why people say quitting smoking is so tough. I've done it four times."
- Jake Johannsen