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w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m           

March 27 - 31 2006

March 31, 2006
Lord of the Pompadour

The last few times comedian Lord Carrett has stopped by, he's brought a couple of unexpected visuals with him, which can still be seen on his pompadour page. First there was the Tompadour, which demonstrated what Tommy G. would look like with Lord's hair. This was soon followed by the equally exciting Bobpadour. Then, just when we thought we'd seen it all, Lord Carrett unveiled the Chickpadour. Could a Kristipadour be far behind? Lord may spend hours working on his immaculately cared for hair, but somehow he does find time to write and perform standup comedy too. Recently Carrett released his first live comedy album, Lord Carrett: Unsweetened, which was unique in that it was truly 'live.' It contained no laugh track, no editing and was recorded from only one show.

 

March 31, 2006
It's In the Bagg

As a young boy, Ian Bagg knew he had a gift, it's just that he never got around to opening it. Instead, Ian followed his dream of becoming a traveling standup comedian even though not everyone thought it was the best idea he'd ever had. But as it turns out, the career choice he made worked out quite well for Bagg, considering he's now a Tonight Show veteran and has landed starring roles in three feature length films, two of which co-starred a monkey. Bagg is a popular act in comedy clubs all over LA, and was a regular performer at LA Kings games.

FACTOID - Ian is from the small Canadian town of Terrace, which is located 850 North of Vancouver, or in other words, the middle of nowhere.

 
 

March 30, 2006
Tickle Me Emo

To label comedian Emo Philips an oddball would be a huge understatement. Not only does he sport a unique look and speak with an unmistakable voice, he's also cited as being one of the absolute masters of misdirection. When Emo starts telling a joke, it's easy to lose your place because it's never quite clear where he's going until he gets there. But the journey is always worth it because at the end of every setup is a punchline that's funny and completely unpredictable. Emo's been in the stand-up industry for many years and in that time has released a number of great comedy albums. His first two are considered to be among the best ever released and and have been repackaged into one great set.

FACTOID - Emo's "bridge jumper" joke is #1 on the Ship of Fools website.

FACTOID – Emo Philips was in the movie "UHF" with "Weird" Al Yankovic.

 

March 30, 2006
May We Have This Dance?

John Feinstein is one of the most celebrated sports writers of all time. There's very little in the world of sports that his books haven't covered. From the NBA to the PGA, Feinstein has written a bestseller on it. And it seems that these days, he's cranking out new sports books quicker than ever because fresh off the heels of last year's behind the scenes look at the NFL comes his new work, Last Dance, which goes inside the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament. Feinstein's book uses last year's tournament as the backdrop for the book, but goes even deeper into the past by talking to the legends of the game that have made March Madness one of the biggest sporting events each year. If his past works are any indication (Season on the Brink, A Good Walk Spoiled, The Punch, Let Me Tell You a Story) this book will give readers a look at the near life-or-death drama of the "Road to the Final Four" as it has never been dissected before. And with March Madness coming to an end this weekend, what better time is there to own this book.

 

March 30, 2006
The Showbiz Show, Season 2

Actor David Spade first broke onto the scene as a reparatory player on Saturday Night Live in the mid 90’s. Along with Farley, Sandler, Schnider and Hartman, Spade helped turn the flailing sketch comedy show around and bring it back to glory. Spade became famous for his cynical wit, and Weekend Update features like his “Hollywood Minute.” Though he’s gone on to star in blockbuster films such as Tommy Boy, Joe Dirt and the upcoming film The Benchwarmers, Spade is returning to his sarcastic roots with the second season of his informative program, The Showbiz Show. In it, Spade expands his Hollywood Minute format into a half-hour of poking fun at the entertainment industry and those who cover it. The show airs Thursdays at 10:30 on Comedy Central.

JORDAN WARD illustration

 

March 30, 2006
Who Needs School When You've Got Jokes

Jeremy Essig decided that after he graduated from Wake Forest University in 2000 that his time would be better spent performing at open mic nights rather than attending graduate school. And he obviously made the correct choice because how would all those fancy classes have helped him become the stand-up comedian he is today? Over the years, he’s developed an act that incorporates his interests in current events, music and religion, along with stories of personal failure. And from what we hear, that well isn’t going to run dry any time soon.

 

March 29, 2006
Retiring #31
When Reggie Miller was drafted by the Indiana Pacers in 1987, many Indiana basketball fanatics were quite vocal in their disapproval. Indiana University standout and home town favorite Steve Alford was passed over in favor of a lanky UCLA kid who most Hoosier basketball fans knew little or nothing about, even though he had finished his career at UCLA with 2,095 points - second only to the legendary Kareem Abdul-Jabbar in that school's illustrious basketball history. There were even a few boos when the pacers announced Reggie Miller as their first draft pick 17 years ago. Quite a lot has changed since that day. Today, the name Reggie Miller is synonymous Indiana basketball. In the state of Indiana, he's one of the most loved and admired athlete ever to call the Hoosier State home. That's why his career with the Indiana Pacers is being celebrated as they retire his #31 jersey this week. Though Reggie may not be on the court popping three's and flopping on defense, he's still involved with the NBA as part of TNT's broadcast team.


 

March 29, 2006
The Host With the Most... Redneck Jokes
If you were to say that Jeff Foxworthy made a good decision to leave his $30,000 a year job to go into standup comedy, we sure wouldn’t argue with you. Having taken his redneck brand of southern comedy into almost every form of media imaginable, there aren’t many folks out there who haven’t heard the phrase “you might be a redneck if…” That phrase has spawned an entire catalogue of words that have different definitions in "southern speak" which is why Jeff has compiled The Redneck Dictionary. Along with this project, Jeff is also the author of a number of best selling books, the star of Ace Award winning comedy specials, starred in his own sitcom (on two different networks), is the first comedian to ever have an album go triple platinum, the host of a weekly countdown radio show, and will be hosting the CMT Music Awards for the second year in a row.

JORDAN WARD illustration

 

March 29, 2006
It's Not a Diary,
It's a Journal

He’s funny, he’s handsome, and as you can tell by all the hyperlinks below, he's got a lot going on. Of course we’re referring to stand-up comedian and journal writing extraordinaire, Mike Birbiglia. Whether on the phone or in the studio, we’ve been treated, for longer than we can remember, to Mike’s monologues that he calls his "Secret Public Journal.” In these musings, we’ve learned about his infatuation with pizza, his feelings about the late Mitch Hedberg, his Alaskan Wildlife adventure and his brother got the nickname "JoeBags." If you're like us and just can't wait to hear his next entry, make sure you check out Mike’s website or his mySpace account where you can explore his pizza blog, numerous pictures and a store full of t-shirts, head shots and CDs including My Secret Public Album and Two Drink Mike, that are perfect for anyone who enjoys stuff.

FACTOID - If there is a link we forgot to add, we're sure you'll be able to find it at his website, www.birbigs.com.

 

March 29, 2006
Our First Line of Defense Against The Animal Conspiracy

Since Tim Bedore's popular segment, Vague But True, has become a regular feature on the BOB&TOM show, certain topics seem to pop up on a regular basis. One of the most popular subject matters has been the secret war raging between man and beast which Tim has dubbed the "Animal Conspiracy." The first installment of this larger work appeared on the album B&T Camel Toe almost two years ago, but as the news stories keep adding up and listener e-mails keep rolling in, Tim has had no choice but to continue informing the masses about this ongoing battle. Will the battle continue in this week's report? You'll just have to tune in to find out.

 

March 28, 2006
Marley & John
While everyone knows that dogs are man’s best friend, sometimes they can still be a real pain in the ass. Author John Grogan knows this first had. In his book, Marley & Me: Life and Love with the World’s Worst Dog, Grogan chronicles the trials and tribulations he and his wife had while raising their cute and loveable Labrador retriever. From eating an 18-karat solid gold necklace to getting kicked out of obedience school, Marley was more than a handful for all the years they had him, however, he was also a beloved member of family and his stories turned into a successful book. Grogan is not only a best selling author; he’s also a columnist for the Philadelphia Inquirer.
www.marleyandme.com

 

March 28, 2006
Bob Zany: Joke Teller, and All Around Nice Guy
It's time again for that fabulous feature, The Zany Report, as brought to you each week by Bob Zany. This man of comedic courage runs the comedy gauntlet every Tuesday, hoping that his report will lead to roaring laughter throughout the studio. And though he normally falls just a bit short, this legendary talent refuses to give up or give in. Also, one lucky fan will attempt to improve a Zany punchline by playing Fix The Joke, Baby (live) where they can win a boatload of prizes including a one year BOB&TOM VIP membership, a couple of ultra cool T-shirts and a whole lot more!

 
 

March 27, 2006
A Converse-ation
about Chuck Taylor
Almost everyone knows the name Chuck Taylor, mostly because its been written on the side of the popular Converse canvass shoes for decades. But nobody really knows anything about the man behind the name which is why author Abraham Aamidor decided to write a book about him. In Chuck Taylor, All Star Aamidor reveals the story of the man behind the shoes and also looks into the legends surrounding him. As it turns out, most of them happen to be true. Taylor gave more to the game of basketball than high-tops; he was also a good player, he was the coach at Air Force, and he helped spread the game of basketball around the world

 

 

 


"Doing your own taxes is a lot like masturbation. You have to use your imagination and you pray you don't get caught."
- Rob Haney

"I am a very private person; I have an unlisted sleep number."
- Rob Haney on his Select Comfort bed

"From the bottom of my heart, you sicken me."
- Bob Zany to the cast after they all made fun of his Zany Report

"The reason there is a big "E" instead of a big "O" on the eye test chart is because if it were a big "O," women would lie about seeing it."
- John Alfrey answering Tom's question about why eye charts still use the big "E" on top

"If you can't put cheese on it, it's not worth eating."
- Bob Kevoian on his philosophy on food.

"When I first met Bob Barker I told him I used to run home from pre-school to watch him. Now people say that to me."
- Marc Summers on hosting Double Dare almost 20 years ago

"If I ever get to heaven, I'm going to find the hair angel and whip his ass."
- Tim Wilson on losing hair

"I don't trust a guy I can't sleep with."
-Tim Wilson trying to make some sort of point but not saying it very clearly.

"You don't want your bed to have a defense."
- Tom Griswold on having too many throw pillows on your bed

"My grandmother died last year. She finally lost a long battle with... a bear."
- Eric Hunter

"Losing a loved one can be made a lot easier with Photoshop."
- Tom Griswold on cropping people out of pictures

"Everybody finds Jesus in prison because Satan is around the corner waiting to rape you in the shower."
- Geoff Brown

"This may surprise you, but I don't really care much about 'the hood.'"
- Tom Griswold to Geoff Brown while talking about Rap and Hip-Hop

"Who would have guessed Barry Bonds was taking steroids. Just because they turned his batting helmet into a jacuzzi."
- Bill Scheft

"How do you think they came up with swimming trunks?"
- Bob Kevoian after Chick asked if elephants could swim

"I have such a fear of commitment, I don't even like to write in pen."
- Michael Somerville

"We kick ass in the Congo."
- Bob Kevoian after comedian Guy Torry noticed that The BOB&TOM Show is everywhere

"Girls could lower gas prices if they wanted to. They just have to start sleeping with people who ride the bus."
- Chris Porter on how women rule the world

"I was the only Korean guy around growing up. My house was considered 'China Town'"
- Steve Byrne

"I think a Prepper is one step below a fluffer."
- John Evans on Tom's High School's nickname

"Nothing upsets Tom more than the fact that his ass is attached to his body."
- Chick McGee on Tom's obsession with 'ass matter'