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May 5-9

May 10, 2003
How Many Balls Does It Take to Bowl For Over 48 hours?
The correct answeris only one! Larry Parker of Raleigh, NC is attempting to do the impossible. He will put his personal well being on the line in an attempt to break the World Record for consecutive hours of bowling, currently set at 47 hours and 15 minutes. For two days (May 9-11) Parker will be striking and sparing his way through game after game on the lanes with only a 15 minute break every 8 hours, in an effort to raise money for the Special Olympics. If you’d like to watch Parker bowl over the current record, Time Warner Cable is providing a live web cam of the “Bowling For Champions” event.

 

May 10, 2003
A Comic Reflects on Childhood
Just like most parents, when John Heffron's found out that he'd been skipping his night classes to perform stand-up comedy, they weren’t happy. But once the type of money only a comedian can make started rolling in, they lightened up a bit. With a fresh, youthful appearance and outlook, Heffron is one of comedy's rising stars. He talks about college life, retro music (which was just called “music” when he was a kid), and items from his childhood like big wheels and pop rocks. His television appearances include The Tonight Show , Premium Blend and NBC's Friday Night.

SIDE NOTE - John Heffron is one of the two comics behind the very popular "That Guy Game!" that is showing up at more and more bachelorette parties around the country.

 

May 9, 2003
Joe Walsh and the Eagles
Prepare for "FarewelI" Tour

Legendary rocker Joe Walsh didn't begin his music career playing the guitar as some may think. He started out on the oboe and the clarinet. That's what happens when your mother's a "musicologist." Though he rocked the woodwinds, and later the bass, it was his work on the lead guitar that caught the eye of the Eagles. Though they had been a great band before, Walsh's addition to the group prior to the release of Hotel California is what helped them reach there mythical status in Rock N' Roll history, including an induction into the Rock N' Roll Hall of Fame. Walsh and the Eagles have continued making music, and for the second summer in a row, they're heading out on tour. This year's is the "Farewell I" tour, alluding to the fact there will most likely be more to come. The Eagles just launched a brand new official fan club web site that has all the tour info, and allows members to purchase tickets in advance.

FACTOID - Joe Walsh ran for President of the US in 1980, and then for Vice President in 1992.

 

May 9, 2003
Rocky, Rocky, Rocky!
Rocky LaPorte has climbed the tallest mountains in Ohio, is a world-class athlete having played with the New York Knicks, and Chicago Cubs, and is also the man responsible for bringing back the art of deadpan comedy. Though some of these claims may not be true, one of them seems to be fairly reasonable. Lets face it, who hasn’t climbed the peaks of Ohio? LaPorte is a popular standup comedian and television regular, that’s been headlining clubs around the country for years, and is still an audience favorite whenever he comes to town, sports legend or not.

 

May 8, 2003
Closing in on $1 Million
Five castaways, two episodes, one sole survivor. This is all that remains in Survivor: The Amazon, the sixth installment of the popular reality show. Host Jeff Probst, and the remaining contestants have spent over 30 days in the harsh jungles of the Amazon, but the end for them is near. It began as a battle of the sexes, but has since turned into one of the most highly contested games in the series' history. Still ranking high in the ratings, the show that started the reality craze will be airing its final two episodes this week on CBS, Thursday and Sunday. Will it be Rob, Butch, Jenna, Heidi or Matthew that becomes the sixth $1 Million dollar winner?
 


May 8, 2003
It's Always Something with Ralph Harris
Seems like every time comedian/actor Ralph Harris joins Bob & Tom in the studio, it turns into a memorable event. He got engaged on our last vacation trip, turned down Tom's offer to be his personal 'man servant,' and even introduced the world to his outspoken, glazed doughnut loving, Uncle Mosely. With Harris, you never know what is going to happen, but you can always count on it being a good time.

FACTOID - Harris credits his rise in the acting community with his guest appearance on the hit comedy Seinfeld. Maybe you've heard of it.

 
May 8, 2003
George Lopez: On the Road Again
Comedian, and longtime friend of the show, George Lopez is returning to one of his true loves, standup comedy. Once his network television sitcom, George Lopez, was renewed for it's third season, George was able to get back to his roots, on the road, and on stage. Lopez is taking his act all over the US, but for those of you who won't get a chance to see Lopez live, his standup comedy CD, Right Now Right Now is now available in stores.
 

May 7, 2003
Señor Cavanagh
Though completely unconfirmed, it is believed that the undeniably lovable and always funny Tim Cavanagh used this past Cinco de Mayo as a chance to recharge his musical batteries, get his comedy juices flowing again, and get ridiculously drunk. For that reason, we are offering up two of Cavanagh's most appropriate tunes to celebrate Monday's holiday. Once he recovers from his awful hangover (also unconfirmed) Tim will be live in the studio ready to dispense the high caliber comedy and lyrical genius that you've come to expect from him (confirmed). But wait, there's more! As an added bonus, Cavanagh claims that his world famous backup singers, the Cavanettes, might also be making an appearance!!! Now that sounds like fun. Want More Cavanagh? Check out the Tim Cavanagh Audio Library! VIP Membership Required

 

May 7, 2003
The Courageous Comic
We were all thrown off last week when Bob Zany called in on Wednesday instead of his normal Tuesday time slot, but that's all been corrected this time around. Few comedians have the intestinal fortitude to appear live on a nationally syndicated radio program and try out new material each and every week, but that's exactly what Zany does with his Zany Report. Sure, most of the time he proves why other comics would never do this, but every so often he hits a home run which makes up for all the abuse he puts up with on a regular basis. And for those times when the jokes do fall a flat, there's Fix-the-Joke Baby, now with a bigger prize package than ever.

 

May 6, 2003
Comedian, Writer, All Around Great Guy
Bill Scheft is a monologue writer for The Late Show with David Letterman, has a weekly column in Sports Illustrated, is a comedy novelist, and ranks among the the funniest guests we've ever had on the show. We enjoy his company so much that Scheft actually filled in for Bob during his infamous "nudie vacation." Since the last time we talked to Bill, he's been working diligently on his second novel, (did we mention his first novel is called The Ringer?). We'll get the inside scoop on the new book's progress as well as a comedic view of what's new in the world of Sports.

 
May 6, 2003
Flatworld: The Trailer

You know how we like to make fun of movie previews that tell you way too much about the movie it's previewing? Well, "The Trailer," a three minute move by film maker Steve Altman is mother of all "tell it all" previews. The plot, the surprise ending, who the killer is, everything about the film is revealed in this movie trailer parody. View the Video clip! Nice work Steve!
 

 



"Men have a biological clock, it just flashes 12:00 all the time because we never set it."
- Jeff Heffron

"Just because you wrote a song doesn't mean you can play it."
- Joe Walsh

"I never thought about what it would be like when the front row would be full of grandmothers."
- Joe Walsh

"They say you never forget your first teacher... I think that's because I had mine four years in a row."
- Rocky LaPorte

"I was on my back so much I was arrested for Prostitution."
- Rocky LaPorte on his boxing career.

"I dance like Elain from Seinfeld."
- Bob Kevoian

"Tom is about to set back 40 years worth of civil rights."
- Chick McGee

"If he was my husband he'd be living in hell."
- Kristi Lee on Alabama U. Football Coach

"Those jokes are awful, are you chewing Bazooka Joe Bubble gum over there?
- Chick McGee to Tom

"I can afford a yacht, I just don't own one because I hate yacht people."
- Bill Scheft

"I almost got married once but nobody answered the ad."
- Pat Hazell

"If you lose a comedian in the ocean, no body is going to care."
- Bob Kevoian

"The Preisdent has a slightly more important job than I do."
- Randy Lubas, Comedian

"I learned a lot of cool martial arts moves doing Tae Bo, but the problem is I need music to fight."
- Heath Hyche

"When Jesus said Love thy neighbor, he didn't mean doggie style."
- Scott Dunn

"Somebody in the room will die watching a porno."
- Bob Kevoian

"If you're watching a guy suck a goat's nipple, you need to reassess your life."
- Tom Griswold

"Tom is going to be buried face down, so he can see where he's going."
- Bob Kevoian

"A Stripper is just a whore who lacks commitment."
- Jeff Jena