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May 7 - 11, 2007

Bill Engvall Stars in Delta Farce
It was over a decade ago that Bill Engvall first became famous for his “Here’s Your Sign,” standup routine, and though that phrase helped launch into pop culture, it still can't compare with the fame that came from being part of the fab four known as The Blue Collar Comedy Tour. Along with Larry the Cable Guy, Ron White and Jeff Foxworthy, Engvall took over the comedy would with tours, TV Shows, CD's and best selling DVDs. And while the Blue Collar shows may be over, Engvall hasn't slowed down a bit. He's starring in his own sitcom on TBS, his new movie with Larry the Cable Guy, Delta Farce, opens this Friday, and he recently released a new comedy CD, 15° Off Cool, which is available everywhere.

JORDAN WARD Illustration

 

The Office Cut Up
Kivi Rogers was just your average computer geek, working nine to five with a reputable company. Throughout the workday, he would pass the time and harass his coworkers with his quick wit and comical voices. Eventually (in what we think it was a clever ploy to rid the office of him), his workmates talked him into trying out his antics on stage. After a little coaxing, they finally convinced him to give open mic night a try, and when he did, he knocked it out of the park. It was then that Rogers swore off the 9 to 5 life, and embraced comedy full time. Kivi is a Tonight Show veteran and has also landed acting gigs on hit shows like The West Wing, Every Body Loves Raymond, and Dharma & Greg.

FACTOID - Kivi Rogers comes from a big family. He is the youngest of six brothers and one sister.

 

And He Cuts His Own Hair
According to Eddie Ifft, all it took was one magical open mic night in a comedy club to convince him to leave the insurance business and pursue standup as a full-time career. His father tells the story a little different. In his version, Eddie was fired. Either way, Ifft left for New York city and has never looked back. From Comedy Clubs and Colleges to hosting Shark Week on the Discovery Channel, Ifft has taken advantage of his time. He’s also appeared on Comedy Central’s Premium Blend, NBC’s Friday Night, Jerry Seinfeld's Comedian and was the man-on-the-street for the Queen Latifa Show. screen, Though he remains busy, he does still find time for his other passions, golfing, skiing and cutting his own hair.

Calling For Backup
Roy Wood, Jr. knew he was dedicated to stand-up comedy when he basically flunked out of a semester of college in order to emcee at a comedy club the week of his final exams. Though it may not have sounded like a bright idea at the time, his calculated risk has paid off. Wood has since become a regular writer for a number of radio stations in the Birmingham, AL area, was a semi-finalist on Star Search and has become known for his mastery of the art of prank calls. In fact, Roy has released two prank call CD's over the years, My Momma Made Me Wear This and Confessions of a High School Bench Warmer. Roy was featured as part of the huge Bob&Tom Radio Comedy Tour special that has been airing on Comedy Central, and often takes part on the Friends of the BOB&TOM Show Comedy Tour.

 

He'll Play All Your Favorites,
If He Can Remember the Words

Heywood Banks has been a fixture on the BOB&TOM show almost from the very beginning, which is why it's no surprise the "Toast" loving singer/songwriter was once again featured on the most recent project, Man Boobs. Armed with his ever-tuned guitar, and an adequate grasp of his hysterical lyrics, Heywood will be joining us in the studio to do what he does his best; make everyone's early mornings bright by not only singing a few of his classics like Big Butter Jesus, Wiper Blades and 18 Wheels (if he can remember them), but he'll also be premiering a brand new tune! Heywood also just released the brand new album, Big Butter, which is available with all his other CDs at comedyhome.com

EXTRA - Watch Heywood Banks perform live in the Laugh Hole!

 

A Vague But True History
Over the past 20 years Tim Bedore has spent thousands of hours entertaining audiences. He began his career on the radio but soon discovered that he preferred the instant laughs and feedback only a live audience can provide. That's when he decided it was time to move in the direction of standup comedy. Since then, Tim's headlined comedy clubs across the country and is one of the few comedians whose standup comedy is just as funny on paper as it is on stage. Bedore has written and recorded nearly 300 editions of his popular editorial, Vague But True, many of which he's read on show during his weekly Wednesday feature by the same name. A handful of these have appeared on BOB&TOM albums, including the ones about messing with SkyMall Magazines and spending summers at his lake cabin.

 

Let's Go to the Phones
It’s time again for everyone’s favorite weekly feature, The Zany Report starring comedy legend Bob Zany. In case you’re new to the show or are unfamiliar with the concept of The Zany Report, we’ll explain how it works. Every Tuesday, Bob Zany calls in to deliver a handful of jokes based on current events and comical news stories. Though his intention is to present a report that is hilarious from top to bottom, it doesn’t always work out this way. Of course as good hosts, BOB&TOM are always kind enough to point out which of his jokes came up a little short in the laughs department. This is where you the listener come into play because Zany then invites a lucky fan to call in and fix one of his flat punch lines in a little game he calls Fix-The-Joke Baby! Sounds easy, doesn’t it? To find out more, got to bobzany.com, baby!

JORDAN WARD illustration

Fast & Hot
NASCAR may still be the home of the “Good Ol’ Boys,” but when you talk about the leading lady of racing, you’d better turn your attention to the IRL. And what better time to do so than in the month of May with the world famous Indianapolis 500 rapidly approaching. For the past three years, IRL driver Danica Patrick has been the face, fan favorite and media darling of the series. With awesome driving skills and good looks to match, Danica’s become a top draw and biggest story to hit Indy Car Racing in quite some time. In her rookie season, Danica not only earned four poles, she also became the first woman ever to lead the Indy 500 (for 19 laps), the fastest woman qualifier of all time, and the first woman to finish in the top five. Though only in her third season, the lovely Danica is still looking for her first IRL victory. There’s no doubt in our minds that she’d like nothing more than to take her first checkered flag at the “Greatest Spectacle in Racing.”

 

Our Show Historian
In the world of the BOB&TOM Show, Scott Dunn has become famous for his celebrity roasts and the ability to turn any event in history, no matter how obscure, into a comedy routine. So far he's skewered George Washington, Jesus, Frankenstein, Buddha, the first Thanksgiving, and even the funeral of Abraham Lincoln. We've enjoyed these bits so much whenever Scott has dropped by, that B&T decided to make it a regular feature. We never know going on who or what the the roast will be about, but we do know it's going to be funny. It's not just comedy, it's infotainment.

FACTOID - Scott Dunn is also the author of two novels, The Big Cookie and Through the Turn

 

Making the Grade
Do you think you know a lot about sports? How About News? Even if you answered 'no' to both, Dan St. Paul still thinks he's got the perfect feature for you. In his weekly News and Sports Quiz, Dan (the man made famous by his First Baseball Game bit) gives our audience a pop-quiz based on what's going on in the world of current events. If you think you've got what it takes to get a passing grade, grab a #2 pencil and some paper and see if you're smarter than the cast of the BOB&TOM Show. Take the quiz!

 

 

 

 

"I saw my bra laying on the floor the other day and thought it just looked tired. Like it had given up."
- Caroline Rhea

"President Bush hosted a dinner to honor the Queen of England. To impress his guest, he learned a few phrases in English."
- Bob Zany

"My books have more bad marriages in them than the green room of the Dr. Phil show."
- Bill Scheft

"You bring the condom, I'll bring something to putin it."
- Auggie Smith on dating

"in all the years I've done radio, nobody has ever asked me what Drew Barrymore smelled like."
- Blake Clark to Chick McGee

"I don't know if I want to die, but it wouldn't be the end of the world for me."
- Nick Griffin

"In my twenties, if there was something in bed with me, I was rubbing against it."
- Bob Kevoian on Men and Women in bed

"It's not that I have too many in my pocket, I really want you to take the mint."
- Mike Marino on people with bad breath

"You think regular crabs are bad, you should see them scramble when you heat 'em up."
- "Floyd Tucker" on genital lice and heating pads

"When strip clubs start taking credit cards it'll be the old swipe and wipe."
- Tom Griswold

"What is it about drinking that makes the adam's apples on transvestites disappear."
- Pete Johansson

"Men like women with raspy voices because they think they're done yelling."
- Moody McCarthy

"A loveless marriage means single. Look it up."
- Paul Mecurio

"Smokers, we're a dying breed."
- Bob Kevoian

"If you can rule it a suicide, you're going to lunch early."
- Mike Armstrong on the difference between real cops and cops on TV

"If a stripper can't take a little hot wax in the eye, she shouldn't be a stripper anyways."
- Donnie Baker on Strippers at Car Washes

"Today might be the day I cry on the air."
- Chick McGee

"Some people love rolling around in that fleshy Jell-o."
- Bob Kevoian on guys who enjoy heavy honeys

"I don't like chocolate on my cod."
- Tom Griswold on mixing sex and food.

"I fight like sandpaper. I may be skinny, but I'll scratch the hell out of you. I'm also a heavy bleeder."
- James P. Connolly

"Chick's dig guys with confidence. At least I think they do."
- James P. Connolly

"This guy came up and called me a righteous piece of poon. And this was after he offered me a free windshield repair."
- Andi Smith

"I tend to enjoy a complete physical more if it's done on a Saturday night."
- James Gregory

"Going to the doctor is just one uncomfortably position after another. It's a lot like being in college."
- Patti Vasquez

"I bet when you were a baby you were all mustache."
- Chick McGee to Bob

"You'd better get her a Valentine's day present if you ever want to hit that again."
- Paul Mecurio to Sean Morey on buying his woman a gift

"I get paid to be insulted by you, our guests don't."
- Kristi Lee to Tommy G.

"You know it's getting bad when you're with someone and you want to put your shirt on before your underwear."
- Dan Kaufman on getting older and out of shape

"Chick you couldn't handle a talking pussy."
- Caroline Rhea on the talking cat from her show, Sabrina the Teenage Witch

"I don't wear sweaters. There is nothing interesting about them."
- Tom Griswold

"I bet you'd make a lovely woman."
- Chick McGee to Tom Griswold

"I'm a character actor, which is a polite way of saying 'ugly.'"
- Jim Gaffigan

"I like Canada, because any country that has it's own bacon has to be a special place."
- Jim Gaffigan

"The worst thing ever created was the omelet buffet bar."
- Tom Griswold

"I'm still married to my wife because neither one of us want custody of the kids"
- Marc Yaffee

"She likes to be known as the 'Larry King' of menstruation."
- Bob Kevoian on tampons attached to suspenders

"I don't expect you to look good every day, just try to string a few days together. You don't have to be Cal Ripkin Jr. but see if you can get a streak going."
- John Evans to his wife

"They can't sell you a gun while you're crying."
- Lord Carrett on divorce

"If you've never been to a Waffle House, picture a men's restroom that sells pancakes."
-Jim Gaffigan