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w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m           

June 27 - July 1 2005

Stretch Yourself
While he was enjoying all the perks of playing college football at Cal State University, Bryan Kellen was also working up the courage to perform comedy on stage. Making friends and family laugh came naturally to Kellen but he soon found out that his quick wit wasn’t enough to entertain an entire audience. After graduation, Kellen attempted to succeed in the corporate world, but his desire to put his sense of humor to work forced him to leave and instead live his dream of becoming a standup comedian. Before long, Kellen had won some comedy competitions in the northwest and was building up a reputation in the comedy world. But it was only after he made a huge impact at Denver’s famed Comedy Works comedy club that he was given the opportunity to travel the country as well as perform regularly for colleges and corporations. Kellen has been featured on NBC, Comedy Central, MTV and CNN.

FACTOID - The National Comedy Hall of Fame named Bryan Kellen America’s Best Upcoming Comedian in 2003

 

Mark Your Calendars
Tim Cavanagh has always believed in giving each and every holiday its due. He's put a lot of thought and effort into making sure that almost every event you can think of is covered in his extensive catalogue of songs. Tim has written tributes to frantic Flag Day, Groundhog Day and both Equinoxes, but don't think it's just the so called "lesser" holidays that get his attention. Every so often he'll put together a dedication to one of the big days, the heavy hitters of the holiday world. Say for instance, everyone's favorite day of historic reflection, Independence Day. Will Cavanagh have a new tune for this upcoming day of fireworks and celebration when he calls in? You'll just have to listen to find out.

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Brad Duke - Mystery Millionaire Unveiled
For most people, $220 million would probably be enough to keep you happy for a long time, but not Brad Duke, the winner of the second largest single jackpot in Power Ball history. No, his goal is to turn those measly millions into $1 billion. We would say that’s being greedy, but since we’ve learned Brad is our biggest fan (and more than likely, the richest), instead we’ll label him a motivated hard worker with great goals and ambition. He’s been that way his entire life. Growing up poor, Brad had always told his family that he’d make a million dollars by the time he retired. One of the ways he planned on doing this was by religiously playing the lottery, and doing so with a well-crafted system. Looks like it worked. Today, at the age of 33, he is the president and a co-founder of Synergy Fitness Group, as well as the Director of Fitness for five Gold’s Gym locations in and around Boise. His hobbies include mountain bike riding/racing and giving large sums of money to the hard working staffs of great websites.

FACTOID - Brad waited three weeks to tell anyone he had won the power ball jackpot. Now he's telling everybody.

 

The Unknown Comic
We have absolutely no proof that comedian JP Madison even exists, yet he’s scheduled to appear on today's show. Everything we’ve been able to find out about Madison leads us to believe that if he does in fact show up at the studio, the government must has a severe leak in their witness protection program because this guy’s life is a total mystery. Will there be a mob hit as soon as he sits behind the microphone, or is he even a man at all? Stay tuned.

 

A Cauliflower Ear Is Nothing to Laugh At
The last time comedian Greg Warren was in our studio, he shared a number of stories about his past. The one concerning his uncle Leo and the only good advice he ever got out of him was funny, but the one that has taken the nation by storm concerns his playing of the clarinet, or as his buddy called it, a flute. Not only did this piece add the phrase "hit 'em with your flute" to our vocabulary, it has also caused anyone with the name Nick to be forever referred to as "No Neck Nick." Along with his appearance on the new BOB&TOM album Odd Balls, Greg's comedy has been featured on Comedy Central’s Premium Blend and in clubs across the country. Greg is a former NCAA All-American in wrestling (hence the cauliflower ear) and has stated on many occasions that if things don’t work out in comedy he’ll head back to school and coach the sport. Now that he's become a favorite of ours, we don't see Greg with a whistle around his neck any time soon.

Opie Taylor Meets Don Rickles
With a smooth southern drawl and an arsenal of well-crafted jokes, comedian Vic Henley has been entertaining audiences across the country. At one time Vic was a bored and boring stockbroker,, but that all changed after he took the stage and won a local standup comedy competition. Since that life changing moment, Henley has been popping up everywhere and has been featured on almost every TV comedy outlet available. He’s also been hired to host shows on VH-1, Channel 4 in England, and with Joan Lunden. Described as mix between Opie Taylor and Don Rickles, Vic is a five-time Comedian of the Year nominee who’s act has been enjoyed in colleges, comedy clubs and corporate events across the country. Along with these impressive standup credentials, Vic somehow finds time to work as a writer. He co-authored the best selling comedy book, Games Rednecks Play with fellow comedian Jeff Foxworthy and recently released his own book, Things You Don't Expect Southerners to Say.

 

The Vague But True Tales of Tim Bedore
Since Tim Bedore's popular segment, Vague But True, has become a regular feature on the BOB&TOM show, certain topics seem to pop up on a regular basis. One of the most popular subject matters has been the secret war raging between man and beast which Tim has dubbed the "Animal Conspiracy." The first installment of this larger work appeared on the album B&T Camel Toe over a year ago, but as the news stories keep adding up and listener e-mails keep rolling in, Tim has had no choice but to continue informing the masses about this ongoing battle.

 

No Polish Jokes, Please
We couldn’t find a lot of information on comedienne Karen Rontowski which means it’s all up to her to make a good impression, because this mini biography sure won’t do it. From what we hear, Rontowski’s a popular comic who regularly performs for colleges, comedy clubs and corporate events. Her standup has also been featured on television, including HBO, Comedy Central and MTV.

 

Five Jokes For the Laughs of One
Comedian Bob Zany may not realize it by the way we treat him when he calls in, but he's our most eagerly anticipated guest each week. There are few comedians working today that have the guts it takes to come on a nationally syndicated radio show every week and perform all new material. Then to top it all off, he invites listeners to call in and fix his jokes that some have deemed 'virtually laugh free.' Sounds fun doesn't it? Catch The Zany Report every Tuesday so you too can play "Fix the Joke Baby" where the prize package includes CDs, t-shirts, and a BOB&TOM VIP membership.

 

Three Night Stand
with Tony LaRussa

The St. Louis Cardinals don't have a more bitter rivalry with any other team than they do with the Chicago Cubs. It doesn't help matters that they're in the same division, are both usually near the top of the standings or that they play each other what seems like 100 times per season. But famous baseball author Buzz Bissinger didn't focus on the entire scope of the rivalry in his new book, 3 Nights in August, instead he took a three game series between the two and broke it down further than anyone thought possible. It helped that he had total access to baseball legend and St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony LaRussa (La meaning “The,” and Russa meaning “Manager,”). As the series unfolds, Bissinger reveals La Russa's history and personality, conveying the manager's intensity and his compulsive need to be prepared for any situation that might arise during " 'the war' of each at-bat." Mixing classic baseball stories with little-known details and an exclusive perspective, Bissinger's written a work that should appeal to any baseball fan.

FACTOID - La Russa founded the Animal Rescue Foundation with his wife Elaine in 1991 after helping a terrified stray cat that ran onto the field during a game.

 

 

 


"Being a lesbian is about more than bad haircuts and riding a motorcycle."
- Tom Griswold on tolerance and acceptance

"Katie Holmes says she had posters of Tom Cruise on her walls as a kid and now she's marrying him. I find that infinitely creepy. That's like me marrying Jessica Hahn."
- Mike MacRae

"I feel okay now, fortunately my testicles broke my fall."
- Chick McGee on falling through his attic

"My Latino wife likes the spicy food, but I've got a white man's tongue. I can't even handle salt on my popcorn."
- Bryan Kellen

"When I get rich, you can call me African American. For now, I'm just black as hell."
- JP Madison

"Whatever Madonna believes in is automatically wrong."
- Tom Griswold

"Freedom knows no season."
- Chick McGee on celebrating the 4th of July on the 3rd

"When I was in Reno i saw they have five religious channels on cable. When they talking about sins I though they were reading a list of things to do in town."
- Karen Rontowski

"I think Chick is our Gilligan. He's ruined three peoples lives."
- Bob Kevoian

"The only thing pot ever killed was boredom."
- Sean Kent

"No matter how many surgeries you have, you can't take the depression out."
- "Floyd Tucker"

"Just because I can't believe I live in a nice house doesn't mean you shouldn't."
- George Lopez on being mistaken for help at his home

"I like it because it's not funny."
- Marty the Boss at a recent lunch meeting discussing bit ideas

"When I'm raising my kids, I sometimes feel like I'm being initiated into a fraternity."
- Dave Dugan

"Have you ever watched a movie, then gotten into a fight with your wife about it afterward, then almost got a divorce? Me neither."
- Chick McGee

"There's nothing wrong with having sex while you're drunk."
- Bob Kevoian

"Sex, drugs and Rock n' Roll, that's what bugs are all about."
- Ruud the Bugman

"Is it a jackpot on the Barry Manilow slot machine when his face and two other fruits pop up."
- Bob Kevoian

"There are priest who have slept with more woman than you."
- Tom Griswold to Chick, who has only slept with people he's married

"I don't care if that stuff is made of kids from third world countries, it's good."
- Tom Griswold on the popcorn butter flavor at the movies

"This isn't a new show, it's just the same old crap."
- Bob Kevoian after Tom promised to start fresh after a break

"I'm a clown sloth, you know that."
- Chick McGee

"What has that done to you and how much is this going to cost me?"
- Tom Griswold to Chick after he was complaining abut never going to camp

"Squirrels are evil because they have thumbs."
- Chick McGee

"If you're in a coma do you where shoes?"
- Tom Griswold on coma fashion

"You show me a group of white people I can't laugh, and I'll show you Canadians."
- Tim Wilson

"What's the difference between a Kayak and a Canadian. A Kayak will tip."
- Chick McGee

"How come chicken tastes better when it's got a toothpick in it? I swear to god it does."
- "Donny Baker" on samples at the Food Court

"If OJ committed that murder, it must have been his first."
- Tim Wilson

"If NIKE came out with a shoe for chick, would it be the Air Potato."
- Bob Kevoian