THE BOB & TOM SHOW - Program Notes

w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m

July 17 - 21 2006

A Happy Guy
Doing stand-up comedy since 1987, mostly because he’s funny and hates having a boss, Nick Griffin has fine-tuned his act to become one of the most well rounded comics today. His comical observations cover just about everything (including fashion, love and Einstein) , so as long as you are interested in something, Nick will have you rolling in the aisles in no time. This is one of the reasons BOB&TOM chose him to perform at last year's office Christmas party. Griffin has been featured on Comedy Central's Premium Blend and The Late Show with Craig Kilborn and has also written for The Keenan Ivory Wayans Show. He may be dark, cynical, sound depressed and have a real problem getting along with women, but Griffin is still a must see if he performs in a club near you.

Our Favorite
Sicilian Dish
Since appearing on two seasons of NBC's comedy/reality series Last Comic Standing, Tammy Pescatelli has been a busy woman. And it's not just because she's a total knockout (though it helps), she's also one of the funniest female comics in the country. Recently she's ben featured on GSN's Poker Royal, US Weekly's Fashion Police and starred in her first Comedy Central Stand-up Special. Miss Pescatelli (that's right boys, she's single) is also a Tonight Show veteran and frequently performs for the troops as part of the USO tour.

Poopy Butt-Head, Dan Davidson
Comedian Dan Davidson (or Double-D, as he loves to be called) easily walks the line between sophistication and pure goofiness. Described as a mix between Carey Grant and Don Knotts, one moment he’ll be gracing the stage with a plenitude of confidence, and in the next he’s full of childlike innocence which can be equally as humorous. Dan is the youngest of six children, so performing stand-up comedy is not only a career, it's also therapeutic. He's a veteran of over 3000 performances and has been seen on both Comedy Central and the FOX. And if you're wondering why his website is called poopybutthead.com, Dan says it's because he stopped maturing in the 6th grade. He should fit right in on this show.

Hey Mr. Wilson
Steve Wilson is only 34 years old and yet he’s been performing standup comedy for 18 years. After doing the math, that means he’s been working since the young age of 16. Of course, when you find out he was raised by eleven women, it’s easy to see why he was in such a hurry to get out of the house. Steve has been featured on BET, was chosen as the Funniest Man in New York in 1988 and has an unhealthy addiction to PlayStation, young girls (over 18 of course) and the Buffalo Bills (ah well, there's always next season).

FACTOID – Steve Wilson is the roommate of fellow comedian and good friend of the show Ralph Harris

Comedy Club House
When Mark Morfey made it as a PGA Golf Professional, you’d have thought he had it all, but he wouldn't have agreed. While golfing was one of his passions, he was still missing the thrill that only telling jokes in front of a live studio audience could provide. So, he had no choice than to became a standup comedian. Now Mark is both a Golf Pro and a standup comic, and loves his two professions equally (unless one starts paying better, then he has no problem picking a favorite). He claims that the two jobs really aren’t that different from one another. Both require good rhythm and timing, and neither require drug testing.

Phyllis as Phyllis on The Office
When The Office debuted on NBC, many people where skeptical of the show, thinking that this new sitcom based on a BBC show wouldn’t be able to capture an American audience. Two seasons later, those critics have been proven wrong. Not only is The Office one of the most popular sitcoms on television today, it’s also one of the most critically acclaimed. Much of the success has to be credited to the stars of the show including Steve Carell and Rainn Wilson, but they wouldn’t be able to do it without their hysterically funny supporting cast. The Office is full of color characters including sales rep Phyllis, as played by Phyllis Smith. She was working as a casting director for the shows pilot when she was offered the role, but this wasn’t her first acting gig. She’s also been seen on the show Arrested Development and the film The 40 Year Old Virgin.

Field of Greens
These days, there are only a few leading men left in Hollywood that you could truly label as superstars. Among those few, you’d find Academy Award winning actor and director, Kevin Costner. Costner has been a fixture in films since the mid 80’s, but it was his memorable roles in Bull Durham, The Untouchables and Field of Dreams that placed him among Hollywood’s elite. In the 90’s Costner’s success continued to grow with his Academy Award winning film Dances With Wolves and other hits such as The Body Guard, JFK, and Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves. In recent years, Costner’s big screen roles have shown his softer side in romantic comedies, but in his upcoming film, The Guardian, Kevin reverts back to his action roots. When not in front of the camera, Costner is an avid golfer. He’ll be playing alongside Bob Kevoian and Fuzzy Zoeller in Fuzzy's Wolf Challenge charity tournament.

JORDAN WARD illustration

Comedy With Heart
While up on stage, comedienne Patti Vasquez is more like a close personal friend sharing humorous stories than she is joke teller. Call her act 'comedy with heart' or call it hysterically funny, Vasquez entertains audiences with her charming perspectives on politics, relationships and growing up in an Irish-Mexican-American family. Along with her storytelling, Patti keeps her audiences in stitches by pointing out the comedy in everyday events and life situations that anyone in attendance can relate to. Patti recently found a whole new source of material when she became a mother for the first time. Now that she's once again touring, you can catch her perfomring both her stand-up act or her one-woman show, Mamacita: Tales of a Diaper Diva, that tackles all the little joys that go along with motherhood, all over the country

FACTOID - You may recognize Patti's voice from her emotionally charged portrayal of a concerned wife in the comedy piece "The Decapitator."

Words to Remember...
Tim Bedore has been a weekly Wednesday fixture on the show with his Vague But True editorials, which is why we're so eager to find out what his next installment will be about. Over the past year, these musings have helped us learn a lot about Tim, including the speech he would have given college graduates had he been asked to speak at a graduation and his theory on how women are the cause of all wars (both of which appear on the new BOB&TOM album Donkey Show). But no matter the topic, we're happy he'll be reporting on it from his new home up north, where the introverts stare at their shoes and the extroverts stare at your shoes. In other exciting news, Tim's new CD, Vague But True, is hot off the presses. Get your copy of this new CD featuring over 30 of Tim's best VBT's to date.

And Now Introducing Mike Brahowski
Comedian Mike Birbiglia is constantly on the road (which would explain why he has a giant bus), and during his travels he enjoys taking notes and recording his thoughts for a feature known as Mike Birbiglia's Secret Public Journal. The legions of adoring fans who have signed up for his newsletter get these entries e-mailed to them on a regular basis, but out of respect for those who haven't joined, we've asked him to occasionally call in and share his writings over the phone. In other news, Mike makes an appearance on the new BOB&TOM album Donkey Show in which he talks about the difficulty some people have with getting his name right.

The Only News You Really Need
The lovable Bob Zany is set to deliver his eagerly anticipated Zany Report and we couldn't be more excited. Because he's had a full week to prepare, we're sure Zany will be bringing his A-material for what is sure to be the biggest, funniest, most spectacular report of all time (no pressure, Bob). If for some reason you aren’t exhausted from laughing when it’s all said and done, there's always BobZany.com where you can test your hand at punch line writing by playing Fix The Joke Baby. Pick up one of those "Salmon: The Other Pink Meat" T-shirts while you're at it.

Big Comedy
Rob Busboom chose a life of comedy after being fired from the Washington Times Herald for making up news. Since then, he’s become a touring headline comedian, and part time actor. Busboom’s landed gigs in a number of regional commercials as well as a role in the movie Rice Girl where he played a down and out pro wrestler. Recently Rob was featured on XM Radio’s premier comedy show, New Comic on the Block.

Not Cho Average Comedian
Coming from a family full of doctors, it was a shock to everyone (especially his father) when Henry Cho decided to become a standup comedian. It only took about 18 months for his father to deal with the news, but after finally watching him perform, dad agreed with everyone else, Henry was impressive. As a headline comedian, Henry regularly packs the clubs where ever he goes, but he’ll be taking his act to the small screen when he debuts his first ever Comedy Central Special, Henry Cho: What’s That Clicking Noise.” Henry is a full blooded Korean, but doesn’t speak a word of his ‘native’ language. He also doesn’t consider himself to be an ‘Asian comedian,’ with an act that the entire family can enjoy, Henry is just a great comedian.

FACTOID – Henry Cho is releasing his first comedy album and DVD, both titled What’s That Clicking Noise.

June 10 - 14
Program Notes

"Why did you look at me when you said 'premature'?"
- Chick McGee to Laura Steele

"Climbing around on the old fleshy playground."
- Bob Kevoian on having fun with a full-figured gal

" I never trust a hooker with fresh breath."
- "Larry King"

"The most ticklish people in the whole world are people walking down the street who you don't know."
- Mike Armstrong

"My body has no sexual meaning anymore, so if I can make people laugh with it, at least it's being used."
- Louis C. K.

"At least the US had an Exit Strategy for the World Cup."
- Bill Scheft on the US defeat in Soccer

"You couldn't look down on me anymore than you already do. You are so superior to me, it's breathtaking."
- Chick McGee to Tom

"I think the word you were looking for was 'perfect.'"
- Tommy Johnigan after Chick called him a 'freak.'

"The McRibb is the deadbeat dad of the fast food restaurant. It comes around every 6 months and you're supposed to be excited about it."
- John Garrett

"I know a lot of my comedian friends are a little 'kumbaya', but I would actually own a gun."
- Richard Jeni

"All of my home invasions are in the nude."
- Chick McGee

"I figured, women must like men's rear ends because it reminds them of a purse. It's got two sides, split in the middle and you keep your $&^# in it."
- Richard Jeni on things he doesn't un

"How come when you make suggestions they sound annoying and stupid, and when I do it they sound reasonable."
- Tom Griswold to Kristi while talking about grocery stores

"If Chick had a cologne, it would smell like mayonnaise."
- Tom Griswold

"It was a tough gig. They had to wake me up to fire me."
- Jim Gaffigan on his straight jobs before becoming a comedian

"I told people that I was from Indiana and they told me they didn't know they had such strong accents in Indy."
-Wolfgang Puck on his heavy German accent.

"How much money is Russia putting into this 'international' space station. I mean, it's like playing poker with your kids."
- Chick McGee to Dr. David Wolf

"Carrying around Vagisil is like having a I. V. for your genitals. You need that constant lube."
- Tom Griswold

"I would take it from you any way."
- A Caller asking Chick to sing 'Happy Birthday' to her

"I've been in a wreck in a parked car."
- Tom Griswold

" No, sweetheart, your nipples in the coffee."
- Bob Kevoian on being on a nude beach.

"How come it's always Jesus that people see in food. Why not your neighbor. Hey look, it's Ron!"
- Stan Stankos

"I'm fine boned with gazelle-like movements."
- Drew Hastings on his 'flitting' around

"My indian name is Running Tab."
-Mike Armstrong on his Indian heritage

" I asked my wife if she wanted to have a three-way. She said yes, but she wanted to know who the other two people would be."
- Geechy Guy

"I think you need to shut up now."
- Bob Kevoian to everyone

" I've done about 80 movies, although most of them starred Brian Bosworth. He couldn't stop Bo Jackson, but he can sure keep a buddy comedy from being funny."
- Tom Wilson

"I didn't know I was white trash until I met Tom."
- Kristi Lee

"Pete Rose, Jr. faces prison and house arrest for steroids distribution. By the way, he had only one request of the warden. He's asked to wear his dad's old number."
- "Larry King"

" Hot pockets come in packs of two so that there is one to eat and one to be in the freezer when you move."
- Jim Gaffigan