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w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m           

September 6 - 10 2004

Music with a Message
Comedian Sean Morey's songs usually contain very heartfelt and well thought out messages. His tune Ghost Chickens in the Sky examines poultry's plight against the farmer's ax, his Man Song discusses the power struggle between men and women and On the Internet is all about how hard it is to find love in today's society. The messages may not sound as profound when accompanied by his banjo, but if you can get past that, these songs might possibly teach you a little about life, love and even yourself. Except for maybe that Hermaphrodite Song, it's just plain weird.

If you'd like to sample some of these wonderful melodies, check out the Sean Morey Audio Page. VIP EXCLUSIVE!

 

True Blue Comedy
Truly one of the funniest and most well respected comics in the nation, it's no wonder that Robert Schimmel is featured alongside fellow funnymen Bill Cobsy, Dennis Miller, George Carlin, Sam Kinison and many more on the new comedy compellation CD, Hey That's Funny!: Comedy's Greatest Hits. Now it's true that Schimmel is frank, funny and usually surrounded by controversy due to his comedy's blue nature, but it's not because Schimmel is excessively dirty. It's just that his comical musings tend to focus on darker subjects than most. However, this hasn't kept him from appearing on multiple HBO specials, one of which, Unprotected, is finally available on DVD.

 

Rodney Set to Debut on ABC
As you’ve probably heard, good friend of the show Rodney Carrington will be starring in a brand new sitcom this fall. It’s gone through some name changes, cast substitutions and multiple pilot episodes, but it’s finally ready to debut. Tuesday, September 21, the show simply titled
Rodney will hit the airwaves, right after George Lopez. The program will take its cues from the parts of Rodney’s act that the censors will allow to air and turn them into twenty-some minutes of non-stop laughs. He’s an everyday Mid-America guy, trying to raise his family, working at a job he hates while at the same figuring out a way to pursue his dream of becoming a standup comedian. Make sure you watch the first episode closely because toward the end, you’ll get to see cameo appearances by members of the BOB&TOM band, the ones that worked with Rodney on his legendary tune, Fred. Oh, and of course you’ll also get to see Rodney naked.

 

Hey Buddy, Can You Spare $1 Million
He’s built and sold two multi-million dollar companies and has successfully run one of the top franchises in the NBA, but Dallas Mavericks owner
Mark Cuban is set to take on the biggest challenge of his career, reality TV. After seeing how successful fellow billionaire Donald Trump has been with his series, The Apprentice, Cuban decided he too would give the small screen a try. Only on Mark’s show, he won’t be hiring anyone to work for him, he’d rather just give his money away to a complete stranger. ABC and Mark Cuban are ready to unleash their brand new reality series, The Benefactor, where 16 players get a chance to plead their case to Cuban in order to convince him that they're the poor schmuck most deserving of his a $1 million present. But these poor players aren't just going to win him over with words and sob stories, they just singed on to be a part of a competition that Cuban says will reflect all the things he's had to go through in his real life. However, figuring out which NBA team to buy will not be one of those contests. The Benefactor debuts on ABC Monday, September 13th,

FACTOID - Mark Cuban holds the record for largest on-line purchase ever… a $41 Million Gulf Stream 5 jet.

 

Comedy That Rocks
How would Dave Matthews sound if his singing were slowed down and played on an old turntable? Or what wouldNeil Diamond be like as an elementary school teacher? These are questions comedian/singer/ songwriter Mark Eddie tries to answer every time he takes the stage. Eddie's reputation as the "rock comic" comes from his uncanny ability to impersonate a number of musical artists in humorous situations. His comedy shows are often compared to rock concerts because he's also the front man for the rock band Mark Eddie & the Itch. Aside from singing, Eddie is an accomplished guitarist... a skill he was inspired to learn after years of using an old K-Mart broom to play along with KISS.

 
 

Survivor Addicts Rejoice!
It only took one episode of
Survivor: Pearl Islands for America to fall in love with Rupert Boneham. The tie-dyed tank top wearing, black bearded, gentle giant became a fan favorite from the moment he stole his opposing tribe's shoes and sold them for cash. So it was a no-brainer for the producers of the show to invite the big guy back to participate on the critically acclaimed Survivor: All-Stars, which is now available on DVD. He didn't win the game, but he did win the $1 million bonus prize after America voted him their favorite Survivor player of all time. Since he's been back in the states, Rupert has spent his time selling tie-dyed t-shirts, making public appearances, posing for pictures with fans and loving every minute of it. With the new season of Survivor nearing, CBS has put Rupert back on television to remind viewers to tune in.

FACTOID – Rupert got involved with the Survivor after participating in a state fair Survivor contest in his home town.

 

The True Tales
of Paddy G.

In case you haven't heard, comedian Pat Godwin's new CD, Under the Bed, is out and can be ordered directly from the BOB&TOM webstore. Now you may be asking yourself, "why would I want to order Pat's album?" Perhaps the best reason to own Under the Bed is that it features the genre-bending hit single, Gangsta Folk, as well as the catchy little tune about old folks getting it on, First Date. But lets say you're one of those people who downloads all their music over the internet. You should still buy the album because every purchase helps poor Pat get one step closer to being able to afford that shower curtain he so desperately needs for his new apartment, and if he sells enough, he could possibly give Tom's son his bed back. Now don't you feel guilty for not already owning one? Godwin is on his way back to the Friggemall complex, and if his past appearances are any indication, we expect to hear a few new soon to be classics, and of course, all hi s latest stalker stories.

SIDE NOTE - Pat Godwin will be performing LIVE with the BOB&TOM Band this Friday at the Rupp Arena in Lexington, KY

 

Straight From the Vile File
"Vile File" mastermind Dwight York isn't just a funny comic with a style and delivery all his own, he's also one of the best joke writers and a masters of misdirection you'll ever hear. York comes loaded with an endless arsenal of clever one-liners and short stories ranging from the innocent “They say gambling is a sin, but I’m betting god will forgive me,” to the slightly more bawdy “I brought home a woman from the bar last night but ended up passing out on the couch. I must've grabbed the wrong drink.” Many of these jokes are as fun to read as they are to listen to which is why Dwight has compiled the best of the worst and put them in his book, The Vile File.

 

Once Screech, Always Screech
Once known as Samuel “Screech” Powers on the hit teenage comedy show
Saved By the Bell, Dustin Diamond is now an up and coming standup comedian. After portraying his monumentally geeky character on almost every incarnation of SBTB imaginable, Diamond has hit the road to test out his act in front of live audiences. So far he's been a hit, and has been selling out shows all over the country. Though he played the part of a dimwitted dweeb to perfection on television, and will forever be recognized as Screech, Diamond is actually a lot less nerdy than you might think. He plays bass in a band, has a black belt in karate, is a chess master and once dated a hot Russian model.

FACTOID - Dustin Diamond defeated Horshack from "Welcome Back, Kotter" on an episode of Celebrity Boxing.

 

Russian Roulette Anyone?
Most comedians claim to have come from bizarre backgrounds, but Wild Bill Bauer is proof positive of what can happen when you grow up around unstable relatives. A brilliant writer with a unique and manic delivery style, Bauer combines his outlandish observations and peculiar personal tales into a comedy act that is hilariously shocking and a lot like an episode of Jerry Springer. Known to the BOB&TOM community as the guy with the uncle who plays Russian Roulette, Wild Bill Bauer is one of the few guest comedians who made an appearance on BOB&TOM's Greatest Hits Vol. 1 album.

 

A League Of His Own
Comedian Dan St. Paul has become a legend among listeners of the BOB&TOM show even if they may not realize it. If we had to choose the most frequently asked question we receive each day, it would have to be "who does that bit where Jesus is playing baseball." The answer, of course, is Dan St. Paul. His biblical baseball game pieces rank among the most highly sought after comedy bits in the show's history, which is why the entire trilogy is featured on the album Wild About Harry. For those who don't know it, Dan does perform some jokes that have nothing at all to do with our national pastime. Need proof? Check out his one-man show (Outer Mission, Middle Class), his comedy tour (Four Stand-up Dads), or the Dan St. Paul VIP audio page.

 

On the Road
with Mitch Hedberg

Hilarious standup comedian Mitch Hedberg is one of the most popular comics among fans of Comedy Central. Which is why it makes perfect sense that they’d choose him to co-headline their National Comedy Tour. Along with friend of the show Stephen Lynch, Hedberg is traveling the country performing his observational comedy. Mitch looks like your stereotypical grungy Gen-Xer, but he's no slacker. Deep down his mind is always at work, finding the humor in ordinary things, and every day events. Along with headlining this national tour, Mitch has also released the DVD Mitch All Together, and the CD Strategic Grill Locations.

 

Duke's NFL Blues Everybody
Because you demanded it, but mostly because we love it so much, this week marks the return of Duke Tumatoe's popular weekly report of professional football, The NFL Song. Mark your calendars because each and every Wednesday for the next 17 weeks Duke will stop by to deliver a bluesy musical review of the week that was (or in this case, the week that will be) in the National Football League. If by some chance you've never caught The NFL Song in all the years Duke's been performing it, take our word for it, this annual fall feature is not to be missed. Think of it as the inexpensive version of NFL Sunday Ticket.

SIDE NOTE - Though this hasn't been confirmed, we've heard rumors that along with the return of the NFL Song, Bass Talk will also be kicking off a brand new season.

 

Vague But Nude
Now that Tim Bedore's popular segment, Vague But True has become a regular feature on the BOB&TOM show, we can't wait to find out what the topic of each new installment will be. Whether the inspiration for his editorials has been ripped from the headlines or is based on his own life experiences (such as last week when he talked about accidentally walking through a gay nude beach) you know be reporting them each week from his dinning room, comfortably seated in a big blue beanbag chair. And, hopefully, he'll be wearing some clothes. Bedore is currently performing his standup as part of the Four Stand-up Dads comedy tour.

 

Prepare to Be Insulted
Any Fan of Late Night with Conan O’Brien or Saturday Night Live is already familiar with Robert Smigel’s work, though they may not know it. Smigel has been a writer for SNL since 1985 (their longest running writer), and during his tenure there created memorable sketches as well as the "TV Funhouse" cartoons. However it was on Late Night where his most infamous creation was born, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. Triumph is notorious for his extremely quick wit and relentless wisecracks on celebrities and pop culture. This insult spouting canine has appeared on "Hollywood Squares," "MTV’s Video Music Awards" and was even involved in a lawsuit with Pets.com for insulting their sock-puppet spokesman. If you're a big fan of the cigar chomping, hat sporting, poop-loving pooch, check out his brand new DVDs, The Conan O’Brien 10th  10th Anniversary Special and The Best of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog.

Illustration - Jordan Ward

 

Laughing on the Inside
Fresh off his Labor Day Telethon appearance, comedian Bob Zany is poised to return to do what he does best, The Zany Report. Even though every week seems to be a constant struggle, this hasn't kept Zany from making it his personal mission to deliver a Report that requires zero fixing and gets everyone in the studio to laugh, at least once. And even if the Report falls flat, there's always Fix-the-Joke Baby and the Bing Crosby Joke of the Week to save the segment. Because as we all know, everything seems funnier when there are prizes involved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


"There are no good ways to die."
- Chick McGee on passing away during sex

" I licked an ashtray last night which was kind of disappointing. It was nothing like kissing a smoker."
- Dwight York

" You are the idol of bass players everywhere because you have a job."
- Bob Kevoian to Dustin "Screech" Diamond

" Since becoming the father of a daughter, I have figured out that sex is evil."
- Tim Bedore

" Drinking for an entertainer is like stretching for an athlete."
- Mitch Hedberg

"These two über nerds called my son a nerd, which I thought was like Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly calling someone a pompous ass."
- Dan St. Paul

" Why not let gay people marry each other, they have to marry someone. They can't all marry Liza Minnelli ."
- Triumph the Insult Dog

"I can say whatever I want about Conan O'Brien, I've seen him naked."
- Triumph the Insult Dog

" Shot glasses are just another way of the man keeping us down."
- Chick McGee while drinking on the show

" I used to plan my vacations around my suspensions."
- Mike Armstrong on being a bad cop

"I knew my wife and I were having problems when she started dating again."
- Don Barnhart

" If I was a white man, I wouldn't be this talented."
- Vince Morris

" When I am urinating, I never kid around."
- Tom Griswold

" That seven hour delay during the Olympics coverage was ridiculous. By the second week my TiVo was yawning."
- Bill Scheft

" The Lord isn't up at this hour. He needs his eight hours before He can do any lording."
- Tom Griswold

"I can't stand to hear myself sing, or even talk, which puts me at a bit of a disadvantage."
- Christine McVie

" The weather down in Tampa is wonderful, if you enjoy 97% humidity."
- Kevin Pollak

"I don't drink, so my family calls me an old soul. My friends just call me a loser."
- Mike Birbiglia

" Cosco is a lot like Woodstock without the music, mud or pot."
- Tim Bedore