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w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m           

October 2 - 6

 

The World's Most Downloaded Woman
Cindy Margolis is a spokesperson, supermodel, author, mother, celebrity cook and much more, but first and foremost, she’s the Internet’s most famous celebrity. Known as “The most Downloaded Woman on the Internet” Cindy Margolis became a worldwide sensation and the best reason to have a high-speed connection. Currently, Cindy is working on a new fantasy cartoon called Cindy B.C. and is set to appear in Playboy Magazine for the first time later this year.

 
 

Mr. Paul & Mr. Storm
Paul Sabourin and Greg "Storm" DiCostanzo were once members of the enormously popular comedy quartet, Da Vinci’s Notebook, but having struck out on their own, they're now known as the dynamic Paul & Storm. While the band's name really isn’t all that clever (and is often confused with Pollen Storm), their music and material most certainly is. Not only have they landed a number of tracks on BOB&TOM albums such as A Better Version of You, Strip Club Daddy and The Mother's Day Song, they also have a weekly, unnamed feature in which they sing about current news headlines. One of their most recent tunes, Hip-Hop Barbershop, has become an instant classic and is one of our most highly requested pieces.

 

The Man With the Big Hands
Though he didn’t begin his career as a standup comic, there is absolutely nothing that could ever make Alonzo Bodden give it up now. Once he took the stage and got a taste of what it was like to entertain, Bodden was hooked and has not looked back since. Before comedy, Alonzo was an airline mechanic, working on everything from Lear jets to Stealth Bombers. It was during one of his stints as a trainer that Alonzo found he could leave a crowd in stitches without even having to pick up a wrench. All he needed was a little motivation to turn his natural comedic talent into a career in standup. This came in the form of being fired. Since then, Bodden has been touring the country, as well as traveling around the globe with the USO. According to Alonzo, this means he is the only guy who’s both built bombers and performed for their pilots.

FACTOID - After making it to the finals of Last Comic Standing's second season, Alonzo Bodden went on to WIN the $250 thousand grand prize on the third season of NBC's reality show.

 

The Joys of A.D.D.
Back in school, comedian Robert Hawkins was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder; meanwhile he just thought he hated school. As it turns out, this condition would rear it's ugly head again when he moved into the workforce. That's where he discovered he disliked having a job almost as much as getting an education. Needless to say, Hawkins was fired, but he used this opportunity to join the military. After three years serving as an expert combat medic, Hawkins made the next logical career move and went into stand-up comedy, where he could fully utilize his ADD. Since then, Hawkins has released two comedy albums, worked as a writer and guest star on the sitcom Titus, and has appeared on Comedy Central Presents and Late Night with Conan O'Brien.

 

Happy Feet
Once a simple talk show host, Jerry Springer is now dancing his way into the hearts of Americans everywhere. On the hit show Dancing With the Stars, Springer may not be the most talented performer (he and his beautiful partner routinely earn low marks from the judges), but he has managed to stay in the competition thanks to the votes of the viewers who have embraced him and his lack of grace. Will he be able to charm the audience long enough to two-step into the final round? Aside from his newfound dancing career, Springer continues to host his notorious talk show and is also a former radio broadcaster and politician. His partner, Kym Johnson, was the champion of the Australian edition of Dancing With the Stars.

jORDAN WARD Illustration

 

Mike Birbiglia's
Link O'Rama

He’s funny, he’s handsome, and as you can tell by all the hyperlinks below, he's got a lot going on. Of course we’re referring to stand-up comedian and journal writing extraordinaire, Mike Birbiglia. Whether on the phone or in the studio, we’ve been treated, for longer than we can remember, to Mike’s monologues that he calls his "Secret Public Journal.” In these musings, we’ve learned about his infatuation with pizza, his feelings about the late Mitch Hedberg, his Alaskan Wildlife adventure and his brother got the nickname "America's Guest." If you're like us and just can't wait to hear his next entry, make sure you check out Mike’s website or his mySpace account where you can explore his pizza blog, numerous pictures and a store full of t-shirts, head shots and CDs including My Secret Public Album and Two Drink Mike, that are perfect for anyone who enjoys stuff.

FACTOID - If there is a link we forgot to add, we're sure you'll be able to find it at his website, www.birbigs.com.

 

3 Blonde Mom
Separately they are Maryellen Hooper, Joanie Fagan and Helen Keaney, but when you put them together they become the comedy team known as The 3 Blonde Moms. Maryellen Hooper is the quirky one who’s known for her storytelling style of comedy, which normally focuses on her husband, fixer-upper house or previous life as a hairdresser. Joanie Fagan, the perky one, has been featured on the Drew Carey Show and was the warm up act for a number of other sitcoms. Then there’s sassy Helen Keaney from TBS and Style Network, whose girl-next-door looks and sharp wit have made her one of the most successful “working “comics” out there.

 

Gary Gulman, Not the Guy From Diff'rent Strokes
It only took two years of relentless pursuit of stage time for Gary Gulman to finally feel comfortable enough to give up his cushy accounting job and become a full time standup comedian. Of course he did have to take on a part time job at Starbucks so he could pay the bills, but it was still a pretty big step. An even larger step in his career came recently when he finished third on NBC’s comedy reality show Last Comic Standing. First, Gulman won his way onto the show by beating out hundreds of other comedians from across the country, then he eliminated seven other houseguests to secure a spot on the final episode and go head to head with Alonzo Bodden and the eventual winner, John Heffron. Gulman has appeared on both The Tonight Show and Late Night with David Letterman, he played football for Boston College, has developed sitcoms for network television and is a huge fan of Oreo cookies.

 

He's Not Anti-Social, He's Just a Comedian
When you’ve been kicked out of every organization you’ve ever joined and fired from every job you’ve ever had it’s safe to say you may be a bit of a social outcast. That’s exactly why Robert Duchaine when into stand up comedy, a profession where you can make your own rules and people actually pay to listen to you speak your mind. Duchaine is a regular in Las Vegas, but still finds the time to make his presence felt around the rest of the country. Even if he doesn’t stop by your neck of the woods, you can hear him on his new CD, Run When the Cops Show Up, available on his website.

 

Live From His Home, It's Tim Bedore
It's been a long seve days since we last visited with comedian Tim Bedore, which is why we're so eager to have him back on his special line ready to deliver another exciting edition of Vague But True. Live from his home in Minnesota where he's seated comfortably at mission control, Tim shares his thoughts on life, society, politics and his day to day activities, presented in the form of in-depth, entertaining editorials. Over the past year, these musings have helped us learn a lot about Bedore, including his thoughts on downloading movies, the joy one can find in a SkyMall magazine, his time spent at summer camp and his theory on how animals are trying to wipe out our species.

 

The NFL Song: Week 5
Week four of NFL action has come and gone but don't worry if you missed any of the previous week's action because Duke Tumatoe's back with another edition of the NFL Song. After only a few weeks of football, the field of 32 is already beginning to separate. The Colts survived a wacky gimmick play to remain undefeated, meanwhile the Ravens eeked one out over the Chargers and the Bears totally destroyed the defending NFC champs in primetime to do the same. But there is still a long way to go which means Duke has more than enough to sing about this week.

 

Caliendo Returns
to Letterman
Frank Caliendo became a part of pop culture the last time he appeared on The Late Show with David Letter by performing one of the best George W. Bush impressions ever caught on tape. The clip circulated the internet and was water cooler talk for weeks. Frank is hoping to recapture a little bit of that magic when he again joins Dave this Thursday, October 5th. For those of you who aren't familiar with Frank's work, he's not only the famous John Madden guy, he's got more voices in his arsenal than any one comedian should be allowed to have. Caliendo's fantastic impressions include Al Pacino, Adam Sandler, Robin Williams, Ted Knight, and Chick's personal favorite, Jeff Golfblum. Frank also performs comedy sketches during the NFL on FOX pregame show each and every Sunday. For more Frank, check out www.frankcaliendo.org

 

Big Guy, Big Laughs
John Pinette has made a career out of making people laugh, whether he was doing it on stage, on screen, or on CD. He was named the American Comedy Awards Comedian of the Year in 1999 and has been featured in the hit films Duets, Junior, Dear God and The Punisher and in the television shows Parker Lewis Can’t Lose and Seinfeld. Before all that, he was just a young kid trying to make it in Boston until he got his big break and was asked to tour with Frank Sinatra. These days, Pinette continues to act and recently released a brand new CD?DVD comb, I Say ‘Nay Nay.

 

Need a Joke,
Ask Bill Scheft
Former stand-up comedian turned joke writer turned novelist, Bill Scheft not only the author of the great novel, The Ringer (soon to be a major motion picture) and the book The Best of The Show (now in paperback), he's also the man behind the Thurber Prize in American Humor nominated novel, Time Won't Let Me. This most recent work of fiction focuses on the fall & resurrection of a fabled garage band, loosely based on his brother's real life experiences and has been getting great reviews. Though he's often kept busy pumping this book, Scheft is still an active freelance writer and recently rejoined The Late Show with David Letterman where he'd been the head monologue writer for quite some time.

 

We All Remember How It Went Last Week
It's time again for that fabulous feature, The Zany Report, as brought to you each week by Bob Zany. This man of comedic courage runs the comedy gauntlet every Tuesday, hoping that his report will lead to roaring laughter throughout the studio. And though he normally falls just a bit short, this legendary talent refuses to give up or give in. Also, one lucky fan will attempt to improve a Zany punchline by playing Fix The Joke, Baby (live) where they can win a boatload of prizes including a one year BOB&TOM VIP membership, a couple of ultra cool T-shirts and a whole lot more!

JORDAN WARD ILLUSTRATION

 

Now a Late Show with Letterman Veteran
Roy Wood, Jr. knew he was dedicated to stand-up comedy when he basically flunked out of a semester of college in order to emcee at a comedy club the week of his final exams. Though it may not have sounded like a bright idea at the time, his calculated risk has paid off. Wood has since become a regular writer for a number of radio stations in the Birmingham, AL area, was a semi-finalist on Star Search and has become known for his mastery of the art of prank calls. In fact, Roy has released two prank call CD's over the years, My Momma Made Me Wear This and Confessions of a High School Bench Warmer. Roy was recently featured as part of the huge Bob&Tom Radio Comedy Tour special that will aired on Comedy Central, and will be returning to TV when he makes his first appearance on The Late Show with David Letterman this Monday night.

 

 

 

 


"Those new sports tampons might be better for sports that use periods instead of quarters."
- Bob Kevoian

"I don't drink tequilla anymore because it makes me ski."
- John Pinnette

"Alfalfa sprouts make angels cry."
- John Pinnette

"I'm a fantasy football widow."
- Caroline Rhea

"My wife is Hawaiian. Well, no she's not but she's shaped like a pineapple."
- Bobby Slayton

"You're the boomerang of comedy, you just keep coming back."
- Bob Kevoian to Tim Cavanagh

"I am trying to learn Spanish so that I can start Text-Mexing people."
- Heywood Banks

"I won't tell you how many times my dad has been married, but if they were sandwiches, his next one would be free."
- Jimmy Pardo

"Using it as a suppository seems to take all of the romance out of heroin."
- Tom Griswold

"In my twenties I was anal about my birth control. Literally."
- Laurie Kilmartin

"Some day I want to hold your hand and run across the rainbow little fluff-puff."
- Harland Williams to Frank Caliendo as George W. Bush

"I feel like a dog listening to a card trick."
- Chick McGee while listening to Don McMillan's tech joke

"You know who likes to get fisted? Sock puppets."
- Daniel Tosh

" I wear black condoms because they're slimming."
- Daniel Tosh

"Nothing beats a good cookie."
- Kristi Lee

"I've been on drugs for a week, I don't know what real life is like right now."
- Kristi Lee

"Why did you look at me when you said 'premature'?"
- Chick McGee to Laura Steele

"Climbing around on the old fleshy playground."
- Bob Kevoian on having fun with a full-figured gal

" I never trust a hooker with fresh breath."
- "Larry King"

"The most ticklish people in the whole world are people walking down the street who you don't know."
- Mike Armstrong

"My body has no sexual meaning anymore, so if I can make people laugh with it, at least it's being used."
- Louis C. K.

"At least the US had an Exit Strategy for the World Cup."
- Bill Scheft on the US defeat in Soccer

"You couldn't look down on me anymore than you already do. You are so superior to me, it's breathtaking."
- Chick McGee to Tom

"I think the word you were looking for was 'perfect.'"
- Tommy Johnigan after Chick called him a 'freak.'

"The McRibb is the deadbeat dad of the fast food restaurant. It comes around every 6 months and you're supposed to be excited about it."
- John Garrett

"I know a lot of my comedian friends are a little 'kumbaya', but I would actually own a gun."
- Richard Jeni

"All of my home invasions are in the nude."
- Chick McGee

"I figured, women must like men's rear ends because it reminds them of a purse. It's got two sides, split in the middle and you keep your $&^# in it."
- Richard Jeni on things he doesn't un

"How come when you make suggestions they sound annoying and stupid, and when I do it they sound reasonable."
- Tom Griswold to Kristi while talking about grocery stores

"If Chick had a cologne, it would smell like mayonnaise."
- Tom Griswold

"It was a tough gig. They had to wake me up to fire me."
- Jim Gaffigan on his straight jobs before becoming a comedian

"I told people that I was from Indiana and they told me they didn't know they had such strong accents in Indy."
-Wolfgang Puck on his heavy German accent.

"How much money is Russia putting into this 'international' space station. I mean, it's like playing poker with your kids."
- Chick McGee to Dr. David Wolf

"Carrying around Vagisil is like having a I. V. for your genitals. You need that constant lube."
- Tom Griswold