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w w w . b o b a n d t o m . c o m           

November 27 - December 1 2006

Time To Laugh Again With Gaffigan
Twice in one week? How can we be so lucky! Whether talking about cake, being a vegetarian, or his desire to be able to end any conversation by saying "and cut," Jim Gaffigan is one of the funniest guys in America. That's probably why he is popping up all over the place as of late. Not only is he one of our most frequent guests, he's also a regular on Late Night with Conan O'Brien (who also doubles as his animated crime fighting partner in The Pale Force), appears in countless Sierra Mist commercials, is performing around the country on his Beyond The Pale standup comedy tour and will be starring in a new TBS sitcom, My Boys which premiers Monday at 10pm ET. Yeah, he's a busy guy.

JORDAN WARD illustration
 

Path of Most Resistance
 You may have seen him on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno, or you may have seen him on the big screen starring in the documentary Comedian along with Jerry Seinfeld, but if you haven’t seen him live, you don’t know the real Orny Adams. Some say he might have come off arrogant and unlikable in the film, but Jerry Seinfeld disagrees, saying that no comedian can make it in this business without those traits. Jerry says it’s his honest, emotional and unvarnished comedy that people are looking for these days and that’s why he’ll be successful. And in case you haven't heard, Orny also just released a new comedy album, Path of Most Resistance, which is available exclusively on his website.


Coming Soon to HBO
Latino comedian Rick Gutierrez has been cracking up audiences across the country with his throwback takes on traditional family values and outlooks on marriage for years, but it’s about time some higher ups in Hollywood finally got wind of his comedic talents. Gutierrez is slated to star the film Tortilla Heaven with good friend of the show George Lopez in 2007. But while he's awaiting the film's release, he continues to tour around the country performing standup comedy, so make sure to catch him live if you want a head start. Rick also boasts a number of television credits including NBC's Friday Night Videos, BET Comic View and Showtime's Latino Laugh Festival.
 

Stanks For
the Memories
Before we met comedian Mike Stankiewicz for the first time about a year ago, all we knew about him was that he was from Philadelphia, had been featured on Comedy Central and A&E, had appeared in a few made for TV movies, and that he was known for being funny. As it turns out, all those things were true. Stankiewicz has since made a number of apperances on the show and has impressed us each time he's stopped by. Now if we could just get him to put together a website...
 
It's Fun To Say...
Dunkleman!
Brian Dunkleman is a comedian/actor who is best known for co-hosting the first season of American Idol on the Fox Network with Ryan Seacrest. He was never happy with his role as a co-host and described it as being like a "talking monkey." Conversely American Idol producers were not happy with his performance, and he parted ways with the show after the first season. He has since appeared on The Tonight Show, had a recurring guest role on Two Guys and a Girl, played a stand-up comic suspected of murder in NYPD Blue, voiced himself in an episode of The Proud Family, in which the show parodied American Idol, did voices for the animated 3 South, and is acting in an independent film called Comedy Hell. He also had a small role on an episode of Friends as the man who buys the engagement ring Chandler wants to buy Monica.
 

What a Guy
If you've ever heard Geechy Guy on the show before, you'll recognize his voice instantly. You could also say that about the way he looks, but of course we mean that in the nicest way. Geechy Guy is not only a favorite of the show, he's also been dubbed 'the master of one-liners' and holds a couple of comedy records including the record for most jokes told in an hour (676) and number of times winning the comedy competition on Star Search (10) back when Ed McMahon hosted. In fact, one of those wins came against sitcom superstar Ray Romano. Geechy is a television veteran and has performed on almost every stand-up show imaginable.

 

Live on the Phone,
or At Least
Something Like It
Paul Mecurio’s comedic talent was first utilized by Jay Leno when he was hired to write monologues for The Tonight Show. However, unlike a lot of other comedians, Paul already held a really good job before diving into comedy. After graduating with a law degree from Georgetown Law School, Paul began working as a lawyer and an investment banker on Wall Street. It was here that Leno discovered Mercurio and encouraged him to give up the high pressure world of stocks and bonds for a life of brick-wall backdrops and heckling audiences. Along with a promising standup career, Paul has become an Emmy Award winning writer for Comedy Central's The Daily Show and makes regular appearances on MSNBC and FOX News as a political satirist.
 

Zany and Funny Aren't Always Synonymous
Comedian Bob Zany may not realize it by the way we treat him when he calls in, but he's our most eagerly anticipated guest each week. There are few comedians working today that have the guts it takes to come on a nationally syndicated radio show every week and perform all new material. Then to top it all off, he invites listeners to call in and fix his jokes that some have deemed 'virtually laugh free.' Sounds fun doesn't it? Catch The Zany Report every Tuesday so you too can play "Fix the Joke Baby" where the prize package includes CDs, t-shirts, and a BOB&TOM VIP membership.
 

News to Us
Paul Sabourin and Greg "Storm" DiCostanzo were once members of the enormously popular comedy quartet, Da Vinci’s Notebook, but having struck out on their own, they're now known as the dynamic Paul & Storm. While the band's name really isn’t all that clever (and is often confused with Pollen Storm), their music and material most certainly is. Not only have they landed a number of tracks on BOB&TOM albums such as A Better Version of You, Strip Club Daddy and More Than Two, they also have a weekly feature in which they sing about current news headlines called News to Us. Coincidently, they're new album is also named News to Us, and contains many of their favorite songs from that segment.

 

Our Boy
Whether talking about cake, being a vegetarian, or his desire to be able to end any conversation by saying "and cut," Jim Gaffigan is one of the funniest guys in America. That's probably why he is popping up all over the place as of late. Not only is he one of our most frequent guests, he's also a regular on Late Night with Conan O'Brien (who also doubles as his animated crime fighting partner in The Pale Force), appears in countless Sierra Mist commercials, is performing around the country on his Beyond The Pale tour and will be starring in a new TBS sitcom, My Boys which premiers Monday at 10pm ET. Yeah, he's a busy guy.

FACTOID - Jim starred in the movie Stephanie Daley which was shown at this year's Sundance Film Festival.
 

Things Our Dogs
Can Teach Us
Ask almost anyone and they can tell you who their favorite Seinfeld side character was. And one character that would be near the top of that list would be J. Peterman, as played by John O’Hurley. Even if you weren’t a Seinfeld fan, you’re sure to have seen O’Hurley go Dancing With the Stars on ABC, as the host of NBC’s National Dog Show or in any of the many commercials he’s starred in. Either way, you’ll recognize him on the cover of his new book, It’s Okay to Miss the Bed on the First Jump. In the book, John explores how and why dogs have served as out most valuable and enlightened teachers with topics like Every 15 Minutes Is a New Day, When One Person Stops Petting You Move On, and You’re Only as Big as You Think You Are.
 

Waiting For a Contract
Musician Jonathan Coulton is pursuing his dream while at the same time waiting for someone to give him that lucrative rich and famous type contract you’re always hearing about. Hey, it could happen. Before becoming a full time musician, Coulton wrote computer software. And before that, he was a young teenager in Colchester, CT writing bad teenage music that only marginally attracted women. These days, Coulton is the musical director for Little Gray Books, has written a song for a show on MTV and has two new albums, Smoking Monkey and Where Tradition Meets Tomorrow which are both available on his website. Oh, and if you have one of those contracts, give him a call.
 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 

"If you've never been to a Waffle House, picture a men's restroom that sells pancakes."
-Jim Gaffigan

"You ever see that mug shot of Nick Nolte? I wish I felt that good."
- Nick Griffin

"We've always had stupid people, it's just that when I was young we didn't let them outside."
- Tammy Pescatelli on the show she wants to do called 'What the Hell is Wrong With You.'

"I will come over to your house and sit on your bed for $10."
- Chick McGee

"I was a Shushy Cat."
- Ben Folds on his former bands

"My wife starred at me like I had just asked to have a three way with her mom. No, it was way worse than that time."
-Emo Philips

"There's no 12-step program for stupid."
- Heywood Banks

"Leave it to you to look at the sad side of stripping."
- Chick McGee to Kristi Lee

"For years my entire career has been getting up on stage and acting like a pompous ass. Then I come in here, and Tom is the pompous ass. I love it!"
- Jimmy Pardo

"So really, which dwarf did you dress up like for Halloween."
- Tom Griswold to Jimmy Pardo

"That toaster in your kitchen signifies that you owe me $18 worth of gossip."
- Roy Wood Jr on wanting to divorces to be as public as weddings

"Land comes cheap when there's a 60% chance you're going to die on it."
- Nikki Payne on Trailer Parks

"I'm in a position to judge Bobby Brown because I watched the show."
- Tim Wilson

"Since moving to Vegas, My kids look at New Orleans like it's Amish country."
- Kelly McDonald

"He's too intelligent for comedy. Scott Dunn ladies and gentlemen."
- Chick McGee on comedian Scott Dunn

"You can make anything sound dirty by sniffing it."
- Tom Griswold

"If you're not good with technology, don't be cocky about it."
- Mike Birbiglia

"Those new sports tampons might be better for sports that use periods instead of quarters."
- Bob Kevoian

"I don't drink tequilla anymore because it makes me ski."
- John Pinnette

"Alfalfa sprouts make angels cry."
- John Pinnette

"I'm a fantasy football widow."
- Caroline Rhea

"My wife is Hawaiian. Well, no she's not but she's shaped like a pineapple."
- Bobby Slayton

"You're the boomerang of comedy, you just keep coming back."
- Bob Kevoian to Tim Cavanagh

"I am trying to learn Spanish so that I can start Text-Mexing people."
- Heywood Banks

"I won't tell you how many times my dad has been married, but if they were sandwiches, his next one would be free."
- Jimmy Pardo

"Using it as a suppository seems to take all of the romance out of heroin."
- Tom Griswold

"In my twenties I was anal about my birth control. Literally."
- Laurie Kilmartin

"Some day I want to hold your hand and run across the rainbow little fluff-puff."
- Harland Williams to Frank Caliendo as George W. Bush

"I feel like a dog listening to a card trick."
- Chick McGee while listening to Don McMillan's tech joke

"You know who likes to get fisted? Sock puppets."
- Daniel Tosh

" I wear black condoms because they're slimming."
- Daniel Tosh

"Nothing beats a good cookie."
- Kristi Lee

"I've been on drugs for a week, I don't know what real life is like right now."
- Kristi Lee

"Why did you look at me when you said 'premature'?"
- Chick McGee to Laura Steele

"Climbing around on the old fleshy playground."
- Bob Kevoian on having fun with a full-figured gal

" I never trust a hooker with fresh breath."
- "Larry King"

"The most ticklish people in the whole world are people walking down the street who you don't know."
- Mike Armstrong

"My body has no sexual meaning anymore, so if I can make people laugh with it, at least it's being used."
- Louis C. K.

"At least the US had an Exit Strategy for the World Cup."
- Bill Scheft on the US defeat in Soccer

"You couldn't look down on me anymore than you already do. You are so superior to me, it's breathtaking."
- Chick McGee to Tom

"I think the word you were looking for was 'perfect.'"
- Tommy Johnigan after Chick called him a 'freak.'

"The McRibb is the deadbeat dad of the fast food restaurant. It comes around every 6 months and you're supposed to be excited about it."
- John Garrett

"I know a lot of my comedian friends are a little 'kumbaya', but I would actually own a gun."
- Richard Jeni

"All of my home invasions are in the nude."
- Chick McGee

"I figured, women must like men's rear ends because it reminds them of a purse. It's got two sides, split in the middle and you keep your $&^# in it."
- Richard Jeni on things he doesn't un

"How come when you make suggestions they sound annoying and stupid, and when I do it they sound reasonable."
- Tom Griswold to Kristi while talking about grocery stores

"If Chick had a cologne, it would smell like mayonnaise."
- Tom Griswold

"It was a tough gig. They had to wake me up to fire me."
- Jim Gaffigan on his straight jobs before becoming a comedian

"I told people that I was from Indiana and they told me they didn't know they had such strong accents in Indy."
-Wolfgang Puck on his heavy German accent.

"How much money is Russia putting into this 'international' space station. I mean, it's like playing poker with your kids."
- Chick McGee to Dr. David Wolf

"Carrying around Vagisil is like having a I. V. for your genitals. You need that constant lube."
- Tom Griswold